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How to Get Out of Bed

275 points| kafkaesq | 10 years ago |theparisreview.org | reply

139 comments

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[+] hashkb|10 years ago|reply
So many comments about how to wake up early... the article is about depression, right? The author makes a distinction between lazy-trouble-getting-out-of-bed (which is what all the comments here are discussing, and, of course, something most of us experience) and the much more serious problem she's struggling with.
[+] randomsearch|10 years ago|reply
Not advice, but some good news for those who struggle.

I always had problems getting up early. I hated it. It was a running joke amongst my friends, any time we had to take an early flight or set off early on a road trip, they had to drag me out of bed. And it wasn't laziness - I just felt awful, really sick, terrible, early in the morning. One day I met someone who told me she was exactly the same when she was younger, but that it gets easier. She was right.

Now, I can get up earlier than my friends. I'm more of a morning person. I don't know what happened, but it changed quite suddenly, maybe in the space of a few months, sometime in my early 30s. Nowadays I get up early and hit the gym most days, which a younger me would simply have believed impossible.

I don't know if this applies to everyone, but I can tell you that none of my friends over 30 have the same difficulty I did when I was younger, but plenty of those in their 20s do.

[+] jib|10 years ago|reply
Most people don't have a problem with getting out of bed, they have a problem of getting into it.

There is certainly some who have genuine medical problems and so who struggle. An order of magnitude just don't sleep enough though. Go to bed at 10 and it's easy to get up at 6, or whatever your actual sleep need is (it varies by individual and over time, right now mine is a hair under 8h I think).

[+] CephalopodMD|10 years ago|reply
So... Does anybody have any actual advice for getting out of bed?
[+] themodelplumber|10 years ago|reply
I'll give it a shot. I've been getting out of bed at 4-5 am for the past 5 months when I have no need to other than to accomplish more personal stuff.

1. If you need to get up early for work, leave a good handle on it the night before. Like leave detailed notes on how to accomplish the next step or steps. Detailed enough that your first half hour to hour will be brainless peace and harmony.

2. Leave an exciting reveal for the morning. Say you finished building a cool new feature. Don't try it out until you wake up. I like to leave a 3D image or animation rendering overnight.

3. If possible change your schedule so that the early morning can just be full of fun stuff.

4. Plan to lay in bed for about an hour before you fall asleep. Incentivize it with a bedtime-only iPad or a pile of good books for bedtime only.

5. Lay out your clothes for the morning, the night before.

6. Do not get out of bed cold unless you find that invigorating. I bought 5 long-sleeve cotton shirts and sleep in those and some comfy pants and short socks. If I get hot, I use fewer blankets. I also keep a coat ready to put on.

7. Make breakfast or a cup of tea/water beforehand.

8. Make a fun routine. I bought a nice radio for early morning use. It picks up stations far away and I listen to it while I work.

9. Plan to take a nap later whenever needed. Schedule in the downtime.

10. Lay out a plan for your entire tomorrow. I do a mind map on paper. With this done the evening before, there should be nothing left to avoid thinking about in the morning, making it easier to consider getting out of bed.

Edit: And yes, it will change your life and people will wonder how you do it. Also I consider this practice a great burnout-prevention tool if you can keep work out of it (or out of the rest of your day).

[+] nicklo|10 years ago|reply
The same way anyone gets good at anything - practice it. This may sound crazy but don't write it off. Go into bed during the day for 1 minute and don't fall asleep. Set an alarm and when it goes off, get out of bed. Repeat 5-10 times a day for a few weeks and getting out of bed when your alarm goes off will become habit.

Morning habits are important because when people wake up in the morning they are extremely tired which impairs their cognition and willpower, which often leads to bad decisions like the snooze button.

[+] arjie|10 years ago|reply
Things that worked for me:

1. Going to bed early. I switched to 9.00 PM instead of 12 midnight.

2. No TV/screens for the last hour to help with that.

3. When the alarm rang, no snoozes. Get up no matter how shit it feels. It gets better.

4. When I get up, no screens near the bed. That stuff just left me in bed with the phone.

Took me two weeks of work, but I started getting up earlier after that. Lasted for about half a year and then I went on vacation and it lasted partway through that. I've been working remote on a different timezone for the last month and that's gone and ruined it.

[+] yuzi|10 years ago|reply
Having a dog gets me up every morning at the same time even having no need for an alarm clock. He gently paws at me until I do what I'm told. Up or down, good or bad, rain or shine that dog gets me to walk him 4 times a day. He has helped me make all kinds of new friends on our walks and brought immense happiness to my life. Does that count?
[+] philmander|10 years ago|reply
3 weeks ago I discovered the silver bullet for getting up in the morning. Something I've always struggled with.

I became a father!

[+] seanp2k2|10 years ago|reply
For me, psyching myself up to wake up at a certain time and making a point to get to bed 8.5 hours before then does it. I'll set my alarm 15 minutes past the target time and I'll always beat it. I have no idea how this works or why it works or why I can do it when I'm not in a pattern of getting up at that time. I just basically convince myself that what I'm getting up for is actually very important (like say I have to make an early meeting) and it works. I'm very lucky for sure; YMMV but curious if anyone else does this.
[+] cmpolis|10 years ago|reply
On a pragmatic note: leave your phone(alarm) on the opposite side of your bedroom or in another room altogether. You will have to physically get up to shut it off and benefit from not using it(and more importantly, thinking about email, work, social network junk, etc...) right before bed and again when you wake up in the am.
[+] elcapitan|10 years ago|reply
I think it's similar to procrastination: Have a good reason to get out of bed early. If you have to get out of bed early but really really don't want to, maybe it's not the getting up that is the problem.
[+] mirimir|10 years ago|reply
Circular: Twist on axis, and shift rotational momentum into sitting up.

Straight: Use your legs, flexing one under your butt, extending the other, and then flexing it down to lever your torso up.

Best: Combine them, and shoulder roll off the bed ;)

[+] trentmb|10 years ago|reply
I cheat- on work days, I have a big glass of water and a 200mg caffeine pill. I have an alarm go off one hour earlier than I need to, take the pill, drink the glass of water.

By the time my actual alarm goes off the caffeine has kicked in and I really have to get up and pee.

[+] Spooky23|10 years ago|reply
The best thing is to have something to do, like go to the gym or walk the dog.

Then find a kindred spirit who will provide you with a little peer pressure. The dog will be happy he got to poop, and your friend will be happy to see you at the gym.

[+] agumonkey|10 years ago|reply
One thing comes to mind: physical exhaustion. Much very often after a day of physical activity, I know the next morning I'll wake up sore, but not wishing to stay in bed.
[+] neom|10 years ago|reply
I typically get up at 6am to start work for the day at 7am.

I use an alarm clock, my iPhone, set to the obnoxious "alarm" sound, and keep it on the desk across the room where the phone charges, next to it as a large glass of water. Alarm goes off, while it's still going off drink the water and look out the window at the light. I've been doing this for ~5 years and it works really well.

[+] rcarmo|10 years ago|reply
I was gifted a combo bedside lamp/alarm clock that lights up gradually a little before and starts chiming (in a variety of "natural" sounds) at the set time.

Thought it was pretty useless until I actually tried it for a week and realized it was a lot less jarring and stressful than an ordinary alarm clock.

I still tend to hit snooze and only get up on the second round, but by then I'm usually awake enough to enjoy real sunshine and looking forward to it.

Light tends to have a very positive effect on me in the mornings, so taking as much advantage of it as possible would be my advice.

[+] imgabe|10 years ago|reply
1. Swing right leg over edge of bed. Continue extending until your foot is planted firmly on the floor.

2. Swing left leg towards the right so it dangles off the bed.

3. Plant right hand palm down on mattress.

4. Push down into the mattress with your right hand, lifting up your upper body while moving your left foot to join the right one firmly planted on the floor.

5. You should now be sitting upright on the edge of the bed.

6. Stand up.

Congratulations, you have gotten out of bed.

[+] th0ma5|10 years ago|reply
A lot of advice posted so far is for people who can adapt to a new sleep schedule after a week or so, which I hear is normal, and seems like it was for me when I was young. However, if you revert back to your old schedule on the weekends and feel agitated and tired more and more during the work week, consider seeing a sleep specialist.
[+] openfuture|10 years ago|reply
Practice.

The day before lie down on your bed and practice standing up and starting your routine (brushing teeth).

When you wake up you shouldn't give yourself time to think because then you will start procrastinating, instead autopilot should kick in and before you know it you're brushing your teeth.

[+] ljk|10 years ago|reply
this anecdote might be only placebo, but once i started wearing compression pants to sleep it's been really easy to get out of bed. i'm guessing it keeps me warm so i no longer want to stay in the blanket's warmness in the morning
[+] gaius|10 years ago|reply
Same as for peeling off a plaster - just do it.

Or get a cat. No better alarm clock than a hungry cat.

[+] naner|10 years ago|reply
If you're a coffee drinker prep the coffee pot the night before. It is nice to just get up and hit a button. If you're super lazy they have coffee pots with start timers on them, too.
[+] iamcreasy|10 years ago|reply
I think there is no alternate to a good sleeping schedule. Make it a habit to going to sleep and waking up at the same time everyday. It works for me very well.
[+] tim333|10 years ago|reply
Sunny climate? Makes the whole business much easier.
[+] elorant|10 years ago|reply
Sure. Get an alarm and place it a few feet away from your bed. Works every time. It's a bit brutal but it gets the job done.
[+] notthegov|10 years ago|reply
Drink butter coffee. The desire for fats and the ritual of making coffee motivates me in the morning.
[+] bgp|10 years ago|reply
Build an alarm clock that releases smelling salt under your nose
[+] snarfy|10 years ago|reply
Drink a couple large glasses of water the night before.
[+] sridca|10 years ago|reply
> Does anybody have any actual advice for getting out of bed?

The only advice that is guaranteed to work: "Just do it."

[+] iamben|10 years ago|reply
I've always struggled with mornings. I've never had any problem working late, but I just always figured I was a night owl.

Maybe I still am, but this year I decided I needed to mix it up. I tried to get myself in bed before midnight, then up at 7 for the gym before work. The reason being the gym is much harder in the evening, as is work (if you have offers to go out, meetups, whatever). If I don't start until midday, it removes any options I get during the day for a lazy (/alcoholic) lunch, or for socialising in the evening, because I have to work or work out.

I was moderately successful at this, but I've had a breakthrough in the last 8 or 9 weeks by getting up at 5.50 for meditation and qigong at 6am, before leaving just after 7 for the gym. Not only has the meditation helped me immensely, but I'm feeling more alive during the day. And I can leave work (or not!) in the evening with zero guilt about not having done enough, knowing I can do whatever I want with my evening (be that work, or play).

For me, and particularly when I was working for someone else, I got up because I set an alarm and had to get up. If I didn't, I'd get fired (probably). I've found over the last few months the key (mentally) has been doing something for me. If you have to get up at 7am to work for someone else, getting up at 5am or 6am means you're not getting up for them, you're getting up for you. It's harder to resent getting up and getting moving because you're owning it - it's your choice.

Anyway. I may just be getting older... Just my 2c.

[+] japhyr|10 years ago|reply
The only thing that ever really helped me get up early was to ditch my alarm clock. I used to snooze for over an hour every morning. Once I got rid of my alarm clock I started getting out of bed the first time I woke up each morning.

I got up a little later than I used to set my alarm for, but much earlier than I actually got up with an alarm clock.

[+] flavor8|10 years ago|reply
I used to be pretty bad at getting up, and fixed it (for me) by keeping the same (morning) schedule on weekdays and weekends. The rationale is that your body has a rhythm, and if you laze around on weekend mornings but get up at a different time on weekdays, it gets out of sync, and you have all sorts of sleep issues. So, pick a time, and get up at that time every day whether or not you feel rested; soon enough your schedule will adjust so that you feel tired enough to sleep 7 or 8 hours before that.

For anybody who needs some help with sleep, take a look at cognitive behavioral therapy (e.g. http://shuti.me/), which is reportedly much more effective than ambien et al.

[+] gexla|10 years ago|reply
My secret for getting out of bed is that over the years I have lived an worked such bat-* crazy hours that morning has lost its meaning. Oh, and I don't have a bed to get out of. I sleep on a hard floor with no blankets.

I sleep on the floor because it's more comfortable for me than a cushy mattress. I learned this from my migraines at an early age. If I'm in a bed when a migraine strikes I can't get into a position that makes me comfortable for enduring the pain. I always ended up on the floor. I think this is because the floor give me the solid support to allow me full control over the position of my body. Years later, I just decided to ditch the bed altogether as it seemed like a waste.

I have no blankets because I live in the tropics.

[+] afarrell|10 years ago|reply
> morning has lost its meaning

This is a bad idea for most people. Inconsistent sleep times will lead to poorer quality of sleep in most (but not absolutely all) people.

[+] agumonkey|10 years ago|reply
I remember falling asleep on the floor (caribbean island climate though). Hard surface will massage your back in a weird way.. I expected to feel like a prisoner but I woke surprisingly delighted.
[+] robhack|10 years ago|reply
I've tried so many things, and most of the things I read here in the comments sounds like fairy tales (just do it, go to bed earlier, ..). I'll spare you the details (I should make a blog post about it), but here's what worked for me:

- get a dawn simulation device (doesn't work on its own, but still helps waking up more gently) // the more powerful/lumen, the better

- likewise for audio: volume going up slowly (I use AlarmDroid), for this, use a gentle non-continuous sound (knock knock, pause, knock knock, pause) the idea is that a continuous sound is too much annoying, forces you to go turn it off asap and go back to sleep. You may use a more brutal sound for your real wake-up time (so, at the end of the dawn simulation), the idea is that you'll have a gentle alarm beforehand and hopefully fear the brutal alarm and just get into a habit of getting up before the brutal alarm.

- best for the end: padlock your alarm in a solid case, and put the key in your mailbox the night before (hopefully not too close to your bedroom, in my case, I may meet neighbors, so it forces me to fully clothes on). A key-less alarm at the other side of the rooms does NOT work and you will just get up, shut it down and go back to sleep.

- bonus : use a very bright light (at least 5000+ lumen) on a programmable plug for the end of the dawn simulation (or just get a really powerful dawn simulation one, not sure if that exists though)

edit: added bonus

edit2: everyone is different, I just wanted to add my part to the overall list of ideas, please check out all the other comments, different stuff works for different people! (the coffee one sounds interesting, I would have tried it if I was a coffee drinker)

edit3: This should be common sense, but please don't use this as a way to sleep less. I use this because even when I sleep a fair amount (9+ hours for multiple days, I still struggle to wake up).

[+] Disruptive_Dave|10 years ago|reply
> It’s a beautiful passage, and a good introduction to the Stoic philosophy that follows. For an emperor, too, it seems very sound counsel. But for anyone under the pall of depression, it’s some of the stupidest advice ever written.

I disagree. If you read between the lines, much of his message is "just fucking move, do something, get out of your current state" and from my experience, that is very sound advice for when you find yourself in a rut. (For the trolls - obviously it's not the one and only way to handle down times, nor is it "that simple" for true sufferers of depression.)

[+] iofj|10 years ago|reply
Marcus Aurelius is a funny guy. A caesar "teaching" people to be humble, stoic and productive ... but of course that sounds really thin coming from literally the richest guy of his time on the planet. Granted, he certainly was one of the better and more capable emperors of the Roman Empire (given the list of screwups, that's not as high praise as you might think), but way he found power and richess certainly had less to do with productivity, humbleness and stoic behavior, and rather more with his family's accomplishments. Also he is famous for his hobbies, whilst he was no disaster, he certainly was no Julius Caesar either.

On occasion that leaks through in his writings. For instance he is usually far more concerned with "explaining" a slave's fate than with doing anything about it. Why is anyone a slave because of Marcus Aurelius ? Well, it's their own fault. They are the slave of their emotions, they drink and dance and don't think of tomorrow (slaves in Rome, especially the more skilled ones were treated very well. It is muslims that gave a bad name to the term slavery (although some Roman provinces contributed as well). In the Roman Empire, around Rome itself, it was not that different from being an employee. Sure there were bad jobs, and allowing employers to trade employees was horrifyingly bad for the power relationship, but if you compare to poor-rich relationships elsewhere in the same time, Rome comes out far ahead).

Marcus Aurelius sounds about as fair and balanced as the American Enterprise Institute explaining why there are so many poor. It seems to boil down to not being entrepreneurial enough. Never mind the obvious fact that being an entrepreneur is only common in the top 0.1% (and there, only in name, I've yet to see examples of companies started by the 0.1% that really introduced a new product. Somebody who takes over part of a bank into an independant company is not an entrepreneur in my opinion). In the bottom 50% being an entrepreneur, an independent businessman is actually far more common than in the top-50%, mostly out of necessity. I doubt any explanation for this will be forthcoming from our libertarian think tanks.

But Marcus' opinion of others is similar : if they aren't successful, that must be their own doing. If you didn't own half the farms around Rome, apparently it was because you drink too much (never mind that the Roman rich, not the poor are absolutely famous for just how elaborate their debauchery became).

[+] tyleo|10 years ago|reply
I bought a few Phillips Hue Lightbulbs for my room which turn on at 4:00AM, right when I get out of bed. So far, any night I haven't been out past my usual bed-time, 9:00PM, I have had no trouble waking up and staying alert the rest of the day.

Unfortunately I'm on travel right now so this system isn't accessible to me. I am now frequently finding myself sleeping in until 5:00AM.

[+] jensen123|10 years ago|reply
I've found it absolutely essential to spend some time outside in the middle of the day. I usually take a 1 hour walk outside around noon. If I don't do this, my circadian rhythm will get out of whack: I won't be tired in the evening, but I will be very tired in the morning. In other words it will be extremely difficult to get up from bed at a sensible time.

Also, I avoid sitting in front of a computer or TV within 3 hours of bedtime. If there is something that I absolutely need to do on my computer, I use glasses that block the blue part of the light (it's the blue part of the light the influences melatonin, which again regulates sleep).

[+] Attrill|10 years ago|reply
I have a dog that gets me up at 6 every morning, but that dog is also asleep again by 9 or 10, and doesn't get up again until 3 or 4 in the afternoon. While there's no way I can do that (even if I had the free time to do so) I do make a point to schedule an hour or two in the afternoon to rest if I need to. Knowing that I can rest for a bit if needed makes getting out of bed less of a burden. I realize that few jobs allow for that, but they absolutely should. I probably get more done before 9 than many people do before noon.
[+] fapjacks|10 years ago|reply
I love how Marcus Aurelius' thoughts echo across thousands of years and enormous class stratification with the kinds of things that every single human can identify with. His is easily one of my favorite books of all time.
[+] wapapaloobop|10 years ago|reply
Even if you're not depressed there are several reasons to spend more time in bed.

(1) get more sleep, (2) develop the faculty of imagination, (3) meditate (it doesn't matter if you fall asleep; you're in bed after all).

[+] stanislavb|10 years ago|reply
Actual advice for getting out of bed? Well, I presume it would be different for different people as most often it comes down to motivation, and different people need different motivation. However, you can take a look at http://www.earlyrisershub.com/ . I have tried to introduce different gamification techniques to try to motivate you to get out of bed. For example - competition, tracking progress and some small rewards. Also, any feedback is welcome. Thanks!
[+] muzani|10 years ago|reply
This is nice! I almost want to steal the idea and make an app out of it :p
[+] lizzard|10 years ago|reply
It's helpful to have small practical tips on coping and how to be kind to yourself when you are too depressed or ill to get out of bed. Sometimes that self care is more useful than trying to go instantly from 0 to 60, sad to happy. Or, than what Marcus Aurelius is doing, beating himself up emotionally and feeling shame and guilt.

While I like Stoicism, I wish I could go back and time and give Marcus Aurelius a day off!

[+] 746F7475|10 years ago|reply
I've never minded mornings. I mean if I woke up I can be out the door in 5 minutes and be ready for the day. At times it can be odd if I just get few hours of sleep, I can deal with a work day, but after that 6-10 hours I crash pretty hard.