[bratfarrar]

I actively try to avoid discussing status. The 1:1 is primarily a meeting for them, whether or not they realize it. The goal in a 1:1 is primarily to get them talking about whatever it is that they want to talk about. Sometimes this just turns into chatting about non-work stuff. Sometimes we'll discuss problems they're having on the team. Sometimes they'll talk about work they want to do but haven't been given. Sometimes they'll have questions about "how the system works" (these are usually pretty interesting conversations). I try to tell stories from my own work history (frequently embarrassing ones) both because they're funny, and because it makes it easier for them to talk about their own potentially embarrassing problems. Sometimes I try to lead the conversation toward something that I want to talk about - like if I need to give them some feedback, or if I want to discuss their career development, or a new opportunity. Sometimes you can tell that they're circling around something they don't know how to bring up, and you can gently nudge them in the right direction.

Sometimes it's useful, and sometimes it isn't. Ultimately, if it helps to deepen trust and understanding, then that's a good result.

[bgia]

It's funny because when I read the sentence "the 1:1 is primarily for them" i didn't realize you were a manager. To the me the 1:1 is primarily for the manager. I need my manager to talk about their perception of how the work, more specifically my work, is going.

[wry_discontent]

I'm an engineer, and my 1x1 meetings all feel useless to me. It is 100% a meeting for managers and I'd skip every single one if I could.

I would vastly prefer an ad hoc meeting when I actually have something to talk about instead of 30 minutes every week where I'm constantly struggling to find material for this useless meeting.