[lohengramm]

I am pretty sure it does.

I also have seen this happen with others, and have met girls who were able to recognize the "depressed and lonely programmer" pattern themselves through many similar dates (of course over dating apps) they had.

Also, it seems only logical that a totally male-dominated lonely and addictive profession that usually encourages and/or requires a lot of dedication even outside of worktime would produce a bunch of solitary men. (And maybe _attract_ a bunch of others.)

[abalashov]

Yeah, so what ends up happening is sooner or later one ends up pulling dating partners from eccentric and probably unhealthy places. And the ones most willing to engage have their own reasons for seeking out a lonely programmer.

One can find great partners in such places, but it's really a spin of the Roulette wheel. They lack the proven characteristics of partners from healthy and likeminded peer groups. And they're likely to have fallen off the back of the wagon for their own reasons—sometimes good, but quite often, bad.

[J-dawg]

Everyone in this thread is talking in rather vague terms. I have a feeling I understand what you mean but I'm not sure. Can you (or anyone else) give an example of what you're referring to?

[lohengramm]

I can totally relate to that... And considering I am HPV+, the "unhealthy" part might be taken both figuratively and literally. :)

In my case, what could have helped me is guidance. Someone to tell me how to find the balance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QsPoBXemFmg

[jacobush]

In as a non value added way possible I want to add that the roulette wheel analogy holds really well - sometimes, only sometimes, the wheel pays out a HUGE win to a really lucky couple.

Most often, not.