[starbeast]

I am light skinned and look much younger than my age. I have noticed over the years that I seem to not be allowed anywhere near any kind of management role. Although I will be trusted with great responsibility to actually research, develop, build and deliver, I have not generally been allowed to define projects or suggest strategy. I am either at the sharp end or nowhere, it seems. I suspect that my only way to be anywhere near being in an executive position is if I start my own business.

edit - of course it might be nothing to do with appearance, I definitely have some negative character traits. Though if it is character traits, very similar traits don't seem to hurt the men with stubble and prominent chin clefts in their careers.

[simaracode]

Start by being a leader without being a manager (manager are made from leaders in individual contributor roles), ask for stretch assignments when some leader is OOF, ask for shadowing to a respected middle manager and ask for advice. And final piece of advice, ask point blank (not aggressively): What do you think I need to be a manager? What do you think I’m missing.

[starbeast]

Thanks for the advice. I think also some of it might just be that I have mainly had jobs for smaller companies which have a relatively small percentage of management positions available compared to larger organisations. So as they tend to only have a handful of people in the middle between the executives and everybody else, there are just less management positions there to start with and they tend to either go to the existing friends of the executives or professional managers hired from outside.

[KMag]

Without knowing more, in your shoes, I'd take a hard look and see if I were too agreeable. If you're technically respected, but not getting enough influence, it's possible that you're not aggressive enough. My understanding is that assertiveness training can help with that.

[starbeast]

Thanks for this. I guess there is a fine line to tread between being aggressive and assertive. I often see them used interchangeably though.