[bsvalley]

In which part of the World are you located? A solution to get over your nightmare may be to move somewhere else where competition doesn't exist. Apply where the barriers of entry are lower because of a lack of candidates available around.

This will help you get back to a stable state where you'll be able to slowly work your way back "up". People who do that usually end up way higher that originally planned, when they fight back after a good recovery. You need a change of scenery.