[JimboOmega]

I'm definitely feeling closer to burnout than at any previous point in my life.

Since COVID started I've slowly been losing myself into workaholism. It feels like there is nothing else to care about besides work; I am single and while I had an active social life that's naturally very limited during COVID. Often on Saturday and Sunday I'm just waiting for it to be Monday, and at least once I worked through Saturday afternoon since I had nothing else to do.

All the extra work feels completely unappreciated. I got wrapped into a roller coaster of a conflict with my lead - within one week he said I wasn't performing at entry level, then was begging me not to leave the team. That just keeps escalating (it's dragging through HR now, but nobody is, according to them, going on a PIP). The experience is, I think, driven by COVID - my lead's mental health is degrading, and I'm suffering as a result.

I'm working hard, with no clear expectations, and no clear understanding of what the point of that work is. I was promised a new position when I joined this team, and I don't know if that will ever come (it's been close to 2 months since my lead and I can have a normal conversation). I am paid very well (yay, the stock is up) but there's no way to spend that money (clothes nobody sees? Trips to closed down cities?).

Meanwhile all my other outlets for energy are cut off. Most of my friends are either sliding into depression or screaming at me to somehow care even more about the political disaster of the day. There's no dating, there's no bars, there's no clubs. All the events I look forward to every year are canceled. All my spots are permanently closing down one at a time.

So there's only work, and the story there isn't very different from my friends; mental health is declining among everybody I know. Sick days are up, people are asking me how my conversations with HR about depression went last year since they're going to have one soon. Engaged as I am there are times I just want to walk out the door. Well, if there was a door. In practice that would just be switching back to my personal computer from my work one.

Frankly, I'm not sure how anybody is not heading to burnout. Either you are overwhelmed with other things (like childcare) and feel like work is killing you, or work is all you have but it feels hollow since there's no other life context to give it meaning.

I tried to take a vacation, it didn't work. I spent 4 days obsessing over what to say in the next wild conversation with my boss (which didn't disappoint, he was sobbing at the end). Sitting in a room somewhere else while everything is closed or operating on a very weird and limited basis around you doesn't feel like vacation.

[_y5hn]

Break your unhealthy relationships. Ie. find new team, boss, job before they tear you down. If you stay, find allies, go out in nature, learn to not give a f. It can take 1-2 weeks to wind down. Do it! You can find something physical, like swimming, jogging, exert your body and mind. At work, stop doing everything that doesn't have clear goals and expectations. Just wait and spend time on what you must do or direction that is for you. Make sure you've resolved what you have agreed to do, but nothing more!

[unnameduser1]

Start with small steps - end the day with a wind down routine - eliminate stress factors where possible - become aware of what stresses you, what makes you tense - try to release tension - go into nature. Its not a magic solution but every bit helps - look up some relaxation/mindfullness techniques. Try a few. See what works for you. - do not dwell on potential future conflicts. Its extremely harmful. - if you notice such thoughts, figure out their origin thought or feeling. - usually those are fears or stressful experiences. - acknowledge them. They happen. But dont let them consume you - try having those in head conversations with a clowns voice or any other style that makes them comical. - do things that relax you even a bit. Figure out what works for you - appreciate the smal things in life. Like a smile of a loved one. - talk to your partner. Tell them how you feel, how it affects you. Ask if you indireclty also make them stresses and unhappy, apologize for this and try to take care of each other and support each other. - try to get medical help, check whats not right with your body. Soemtimes underlying or undetected conditions make things worse. Stress damages the body and the health issues spiral.

[WalterBright]

> somehow care even more about the political disaster of the day

I suspect the lockdowns and such have led to a large amplification of our political divisions.

[JimboOmega]

Me, my friends, coworkers, etc, are all broadly on the same side of this political situation. I do feel bad the things that are happening.

However, there are many people who I can't talk to without them insisting I donate more, I call all my representatives, etc., etc. etc.

It makes sense when I think about it. We all want to feel like we can actually do something when we feel so powerless. I have tried hard at work, they pick politics. We need something to do.

But I don't need to be reminded how terrible the latest event is; I want to get away from the news cycle, not lose myself in doomscrolling.