[marcellus23]

> While "man flu" is a popular term for men getting excuses to complain and play on a computer during a minor infection

I always find it funny how we're supposed to be in an age of fighting sexism but the rise of bizarre gendered stereotypes like this — to the point where articles are getting written about them as if they're real phenomenon! — is baffling. Imagine articles about "woman flu" for the (also stereotypically common) phenomenon of women constantly being sick.

[hnbad]

What if I told you that this is literally what feminists mean when they talk about "toxic masculinity" and that pop feminism (i.e. what sells ads/clicks) has barely anything to do with actual feminism?

Toxic masculinity refers to the idea that masculinity is narrowly defined around a number of traits and social expectations that are harmful both towards men and to others. E.g. "man flu" is a thing because it's generally not socially acceptable for men to show vulnerability but men often see illness as an exception to that and thus some men use seemingly minor illnesses as an "excuse" to be vulnerable and dependent. Likewise emotions other than anger are often difficult to express for men but sports (football in the US, the other kind of football in Europe) is an "excuse" to express sadness and emotional proximity between (straight) men.

The point here is that these gendered expectations and behaviors aren't innate but they're upheld by society. Women's liberation was able to overcome a lot of stereotypical expectations for women (though certainly not even most of them) but it wasn't followed by a "men's liberation" doing the same for men, except as a direct response where women's liberation challenged male gender roles. E.g. with women no longer being expected to take care of the home by themselves, household chores like laundry and cooking have become socially acceptable for men.

Pop feminism individualizes these problems by ridiculing men, but the problem isn't individual men, nor men in general really. It's a social problem and much like women's liberation it requires a mass movement to solve. Except most men still aren't aware there's a problem and those who are often don't think it's fixable (much like women who rejected the suffragettes or the later waves of feminism).

[marcellus23]

> those who are often don't think it's fixable

Yeah I pretty much agree with you and I fall into this category myself. It's obvious we need a movement like that, but society (as it exists right now) won't even acknowledge the need, let alone would actually tolerate the existence of such a movement. Maybe my grandchildren will be able to live in a world that's kinder to men.