Once I got cussed out by a business owner. Showed it to my wife and she told me to quit my job. Said we’d figure it out, but that she didn’t want me working for somebody like that.
I knew it needed to happen but I’d been stressing about how to tell her for nearly a month. The amount of relief that came from her approval and endorsement was incredible. I was less nervous about quitting than I was nervous about telling her.
Great read. Thanks for sharing and congrats on your success!
I'm in a similar situation. I'm working on a thing and my wife has been supporting me for some time now.
Years ago she told me to leave my job and focus on my thing, but I was afraid. I've been working since I was 19 years old and I have trust issues. It was very difficult for me to believe in myself and jump into the void but I'm 42 and if I don't do it now I will never do it.
Anyway, I'm a couple of months from the first beta launch. I'm happy, anxious, afraid, hopeful... all at the same time. I hope I'll be able to write a similar blog post in a year or two.
Wish you and the wife the best! I do not have the courage to do something like that. Even though my wife would tell me the same thing. It is quite amazing to find someone that truly cares about you! Cherish it. I have trust issue as well with my crazy family life. I really look forward to reading your blog post about this. You got this!!
We're a keygen.sh user for our Modality product at Auxon. It's excellent. Some folks on the team have experience with some of traditional "giants" in the space like Nalpeiron and Flexera. Working with keygen.sh is an absolute joy by comparison. It's not without a few oddities and caveats of its own, but the experience writ large is so incredibly positive that those few issues are easy to forgive and forget.
It's really interesting to get some backstage access to how this fantastic product came to be and what underpins the motivating thesis behind it.
From one founder (also with little ones and a fantastically supportive partner) to another, my hat's off to you. My many thanks to both you and your partner. Being able to just grab keygen.sh and integrate licensing into our product helped us go from MA to GA in about a week and was also essential in getting some investors over the hump to funding (because we could show traction and an easier path to more of it). As a result, I got to reduce my stress level and spend more time with my kids over the summer.
I can relate to this on a much milder level. Story time. I was once working at a startup that was doing very well (growing rapidly, getting investment) despite the founders being pretty incompetent. They didn't know what they were doing, and they wouldn't listen to me about how to do things better. I have no problem quitting a job if my bosses are incompetent or if I feel I'm not able to contribute, but in this case my girlfriend at the time was nervous about it when I brought it up, and I let that override my urge to quit. A couple of months later they fired me. I experienced a powerful wave of unfamiliar emotion when I read the "your fired" email and it took me a moment to analyze it and figure out that it was relief, a wave of relief.
It was one of the very few times in my life when I've let other people convince me to ignore my gut feelings. I'm not blaming my ex-girlfriend, it was my decision, but it was the wrong decision.
- - - -
For your amusement here are some details of the business: they had no QA department, the users were our QA. All of the business logic was in stored procedures in the DB which, as a result, was always on fire even as we continually upgraded the hardware. Our HTML was 25% white space because our PHP guy liked deep indentation. He was a terrible programmer but he was a co-founder and a friend of the DB/sysadmin co-founder so he couldn't/wouldn't be fired. I tried to explain to him once that arrays, linked lists, and hash tables were different things but he refused to believe me because the only experience he had was with PHP and JS. The DB/sysadmin guy was a total "Master-Blaster" (You know "Who run Bartertown!?" from Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome), if the CEO asked him to do something he didn't want to do he would throw actual screaming fits or just lie to him and say "That's impossible." They built a skating half-pipe in the office even though none of them skated. It was madness. But the users loved us and the numbers went up and up, so investors were lining up to vie for the chance to give them money. Eventually they (the investors) sidelined the three co-founders and now the company is a Wall street darling and a household word. Go figure.
I would not discount working on a side project alongside your day job.
I think the absolute greatest benefit of this is that if your project doesn't work the only thing you have lost is some of your time and effort.
I know people who had "idea" and they decided they have some money saved so they will quit their day job.
And in most cases it just doesn't work. One friend ended up getting divorced and then re-hired and with debt for the rest of his life.
It is important to remember that most ideas do not work out in the end. But there will be more ideas.
I think the healthiest process is to approach your ideas with mindset that what you get is you can either succeed with your idea or you want to set yourself up better for the next idea that comes.
If you look at success stories more often than not they are preceded by failures. If these people treated their idea as if it was the last one they will ever have, they would fail right away and we would never hear about them.
> I would not discount working on a side project alongside your day job.
If you choose to do this, read your employer's IP assignment policy very carefully. If you work for a large or medium-sized tech company, it is likely that your employer asserts ownership of all IP you produce, at work or at home, using their equipment or yours. This ability is limited in some regions, but even California allows companies to do this if the subject matter of the work is in some way related to the company's business. You don't want to spend 2 years working on a startup, have it gain some level of success, then have your former employer's lawyers mire you in IP lawsuits for the rest of its existence.
Ta for sharing your experiences. It's quite clear that you are sharing some pretty raw bits of your life.
"I just finished reading 1984." - No one ever finishes reading that book, per se. It reads you and then spits you out.
"and I still don't have a go-to growth channel" - no idea what that even means. Me and a couple of chaps have been running a little IT business in the UK for 20 years. We have around 20 employees and t/o about GBP1.5M. Nothing fancy. If you can pay the bills and sleep at night, I call that a win.
> "I just finished reading 1984." - No one ever finishes reading that book, per se. It reads you and then spits you out.
Amen to that. Of all scifi books to use as the “things have come full circle” closer, this seemed deeply ominous and disturbing to me. It’s like some sort of “this could go super cool or all come unglued” season enders.
I wish this guy the best of luck and hope it just gets better. The beginning to a happily ever after. But if the tragic ethos of 1984 is his victory lap, my anxiety worries there’s a darker sequel to this story a few years down the road.
Ah, yes, that burnout when trying to start a new thing alongside a day job. Happened to me as well, and it was hell.
Back in 2001, I was living in a small village half an hour drive from the city. We thought living in the country will be fantastic. I had a great job, working for a US company. Super-hard and very interesting projects, I could come and leave the work as I please. Then, 9/11 happened and all investors disappeared. My pay was cut in half. At the same time, had to go to the army (I chose civil service to pay that out), so I could only work half-time on my job - another half of my pay went away. Suddenly this was unsustainable, and I had a pregnant wife. My solution - no problem, I will start my own business.
While it all worked out well in the end, the next year was terrible. I would leave the house at 6:15AM, be at the civil service until 3PM. Then go to the job and work until 8PM. Then go home and work on the side project until 2AM. Relationship with my wife deteriorated to the point of almost no return as I was overstressed and impossible to live with. We constantly struggled with debt. And my brain fried from overwork and lack of sleep. People would speak to me and I would not remember it after 5 minutes. It took a lot of time to get back to normal afterwards.
In hindsight, starting a side project was a terrible decision for that time. I should have made sure to safeguard the health of the family. We should have moved back to the city. We could have moved to live with my parents for a while. Anything would be better than the path I took, in my arrogance and need to provide for my family the way I decided is the way to go. The same financial independence would come, with far less stress, if I stopped to reevaluate what can be done - and talked with my wife more. When someone asks me for advice, I always say - do not risk everything for the chance of success. With family, it's family first.
The ability to build a SaaS, sell it as a subscription to other is amazing. Compare with our old parents, without a computer, they need a huge chunk of money to setup a biz(buying equipment, office space etc).
Especially when you're one of the erly to market(look like keygen.sh is a great one) and can move fast enough, in a market that people are willing to pay more than $50 per month, it can grow very quick.
I was on my 4th job before I discovered people usually find a job to move to before they quit.
I can only imagine the psychic damage done to people who hate their jobs, feel sick when they think about going in to work the next day, spending hour after hour in situations that just make them miserable, but can't get out. Can't afford to just quit. In my mind, it would feel like serving time. Feel like a prison sentence with no release date. I recognise my good fortune in life in being able to just quit; even just knowing I always have that option makes everything bad in the life of employment more bearable.
I've said it before and I'll say it again, I would rather be homeless than trapped in a job that's making me miserable with no end in sight. It's dehumanizing.
Of course, many people don't have that choice (I may not either if serious medical issues come up)-- there is no doubt in my mind this causes terrible suffering and contributes to many suicides.
In high school, I started a summer job as an apprentice and eventually worked my towards becoming a state licensed contractor. With my license, I started my own business which helped (partially) cover my costs for going to college. After graduation, I gave up the business because I was tired of sweating in the field day in day out. That small taste of being an entrepreneur poisoned me and I've been left with the want/need to do it all over again. I don't like managers and crave autonomy.
My problem now is that I have no shortage of ideas, I'm interested in everything. I find it hard to focus and I'm paralyzed with so many ideas. I question whether I should have ever given up the service business!
Hats off to Mr.Keygen for making the plunge. Your success is motivation for a lot of us!
> I enjoyed being a part of new startups, those that were still "scrappy." But each time, once that growth-stage hit and managers started coming in to make things "more efficient", that's when I knew that those types of places weren't for me.
I used to be in this position but then I actually became pretty passionate about making sure startups can make it through the growth phase and still deliver.
Us men with wives like this are empowered beyond measure. Treasure your wives gentlemen. When I was thinking about making a change in my career my wife immediately said do it and supported me 150%.
I wouldn't be the person I am today or have the success I have without my supporting wife.
Beyond earning a salary, the 2 biggest issues i face if i were to "go it alone":
1. My lack of skills as a lead salesperson. I'm really effective at many roles - both for enterprise and start up (e.g. - CTO, dev, BA, product mgr, project mgr, etc.)...but when it comes to selling/sales...wow, do i suck...at least as the lead. I'm really good as a wingman/second banana...but to get leads, or close that deal as the lead salesperson...well, that has been my greatest weakness...and honestly one that i've never desired to be good at...but then if i were to go into business for myself, i would either need to improve, or get a partner who is good at that.
2. Secondly, the cost of health care - at least in the U.S. (where i live/work). I'm able to bring lots of other costs down (home mortgage or apartment rent, etc.), but not health care...at least not for my family's needs (*NEEDS*, not wants!). So, if/when i were to go into business full-time for myself, i would need to ensure i can cover such costs...and that makes things quite difficult...especially as per my point #1 above.
...Which is all to state that i'm highly respectful and in awe for folks who *can* make it on their own. Kudos to the post author, and to anyone else who can make it happen!
Question for people in this situation - did you worry you wouldn't get to spend enough time with your kids? Work/life balance can be zero-sum and starting a new business generally leans hard on the work side of things.
Yes. I still worry about this all the time. But I get off around 4 or 5 every day, I take a 2 hour lunch every day, and I get to spend time with my 2 year old daughter until 9pm, then I spend time with my wife until midnight. I built my business around being able to do this. I don't want to "grind" to have a successful business, and you don't have to, although growth is of course slower than if you did sacrifice your personal life for your business more than I did. I ran it on the side for years because it gave me freedom to not grind every day, at least up until it got too big to do on the side. Towards the end it was definitely a grind. But the first few years when I was under $5k MRR were easy (relative) to do on the side because I chose boring tech and things just worked.
> I enjoyed being a part of new startups, those that were still "scrappy." But each time, once that growth-stage hit and managers started coming in to make things "more efficient", that's when I knew that those types of places weren't for me.
I went through this at least 3 times now, and I don't know how to break the cycle. I probably never will.
Venting about how much you dislike your job, and telling your spouse that you want to quit your job and quarter your income are 2 completely different things.
Cool read, always wanted to take my own idea to market and succeed with it, but never actually found that unique idea that someone wasn't already doing better, unfortunately. "The future is here, it's just not evenly distributed" -William Gibson
I wasn't familiar with Keygen before but this looks pretty cool. In your blog post you mention you want to be the "Stripe of licensing" and it seems like you're certainly on your way to that goal. The website feels very "Stripe-like" - in a good way. Equally professional but plenty of nerdy stuff right there in the open. A good way to sell to both developers who need to use your tool and the higher-ups making the decision to purchase or not.
[+] [-] brightball|4 years ago|reply
I knew it needed to happen but I’d been stressing about how to tell her for nearly a month. The amount of relief that came from her approval and endorsement was incredible. I was less nervous about quitting than I was nervous about telling her.
Props to you man. Well done.
[+] [-] pier25|4 years ago|reply
I'm in a similar situation. I'm working on a thing and my wife has been supporting me for some time now.
Years ago she told me to leave my job and focus on my thing, but I was afraid. I've been working since I was 19 years old and I have trust issues. It was very difficult for me to believe in myself and jump into the void but I'm 42 and if I don't do it now I will never do it.
Anyway, I'm a couple of months from the first beta launch. I'm happy, anxious, afraid, hopeful... all at the same time. I hope I'll be able to write a similar blog post in a year or two.
[+] [-] tkojames|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] pcurve|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] ezekg|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] emadabdulrahim|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] sound1|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] dSebastien|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] im_down_w_otp|4 years ago|reply
It's really interesting to get some backstage access to how this fantastic product came to be and what underpins the motivating thesis behind it.
From one founder (also with little ones and a fantastically supportive partner) to another, my hat's off to you. My many thanks to both you and your partner. Being able to just grab keygen.sh and integrate licensing into our product helped us go from MA to GA in about a week and was also essential in getting some investors over the hump to funding (because we could show traction and an easier path to more of it). As a result, I got to reduce my stress level and spend more time with my kids over the summer.
[+] [-] ezekg|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] carapace|4 years ago|reply
It was one of the very few times in my life when I've let other people convince me to ignore my gut feelings. I'm not blaming my ex-girlfriend, it was my decision, but it was the wrong decision.
- - - -
For your amusement here are some details of the business: they had no QA department, the users were our QA. All of the business logic was in stored procedures in the DB which, as a result, was always on fire even as we continually upgraded the hardware. Our HTML was 25% white space because our PHP guy liked deep indentation. He was a terrible programmer but he was a co-founder and a friend of the DB/sysadmin co-founder so he couldn't/wouldn't be fired. I tried to explain to him once that arrays, linked lists, and hash tables were different things but he refused to believe me because the only experience he had was with PHP and JS. The DB/sysadmin guy was a total "Master-Blaster" (You know "Who run Bartertown!?" from Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome), if the CEO asked him to do something he didn't want to do he would throw actual screaming fits or just lie to him and say "That's impossible." They built a skating half-pipe in the office even though none of them skated. It was madness. But the users loved us and the numbers went up and up, so investors were lining up to vie for the chance to give them money. Eventually they (the investors) sidelined the three co-founders and now the company is a Wall street darling and a household word. Go figure.
[+] [-] cm2012|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] quotz|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] lmilcin|4 years ago|reply
I think the absolute greatest benefit of this is that if your project doesn't work the only thing you have lost is some of your time and effort.
I know people who had "idea" and they decided they have some money saved so they will quit their day job.
And in most cases it just doesn't work. One friend ended up getting divorced and then re-hired and with debt for the rest of his life.
It is important to remember that most ideas do not work out in the end. But there will be more ideas.
I think the healthiest process is to approach your ideas with mindset that what you get is you can either succeed with your idea or you want to set yourself up better for the next idea that comes.
If you look at success stories more often than not they are preceded by failures. If these people treated their idea as if it was the last one they will ever have, they would fail right away and we would never hear about them.
[+] [-] ryandrake|4 years ago|reply
If you choose to do this, read your employer's IP assignment policy very carefully. If you work for a large or medium-sized tech company, it is likely that your employer asserts ownership of all IP you produce, at work or at home, using their equipment or yours. This ability is limited in some regions, but even California allows companies to do this if the subject matter of the work is in some way related to the company's business. You don't want to spend 2 years working on a startup, have it gain some level of success, then have your former employer's lawyers mire you in IP lawsuits for the rest of its existence.
[+] [-] gerdesj|4 years ago|reply
"I just finished reading 1984." - No one ever finishes reading that book, per se. It reads you and then spits you out.
"and I still don't have a go-to growth channel" - no idea what that even means. Me and a couple of chaps have been running a little IT business in the UK for 20 years. We have around 20 employees and t/o about GBP1.5M. Nothing fancy. If you can pay the bills and sleep at night, I call that a win.
[+] [-] travisgriggs|4 years ago|reply
Amen to that. Of all scifi books to use as the “things have come full circle” closer, this seemed deeply ominous and disturbing to me. It’s like some sort of “this could go super cool or all come unglued” season enders.
I wish this guy the best of luck and hope it just gets better. The beginning to a happily ever after. But if the tragic ethos of 1984 is his victory lap, my anxiety worries there’s a darker sequel to this story a few years down the road.
[+] [-] effingwewt|4 years ago|reply
I still can't believe 1984 isn't required reading. I wonder if anything pertinent/worthwhile is any longer.
[+] [-] thargor|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] metadata|4 years ago|reply
Back in 2001, I was living in a small village half an hour drive from the city. We thought living in the country will be fantastic. I had a great job, working for a US company. Super-hard and very interesting projects, I could come and leave the work as I please. Then, 9/11 happened and all investors disappeared. My pay was cut in half. At the same time, had to go to the army (I chose civil service to pay that out), so I could only work half-time on my job - another half of my pay went away. Suddenly this was unsustainable, and I had a pregnant wife. My solution - no problem, I will start my own business.
While it all worked out well in the end, the next year was terrible. I would leave the house at 6:15AM, be at the civil service until 3PM. Then go to the job and work until 8PM. Then go home and work on the side project until 2AM. Relationship with my wife deteriorated to the point of almost no return as I was overstressed and impossible to live with. We constantly struggled with debt. And my brain fried from overwork and lack of sleep. People would speak to me and I would not remember it after 5 minutes. It took a lot of time to get back to normal afterwards.
In hindsight, starting a side project was a terrible decision for that time. I should have made sure to safeguard the health of the family. We should have moved back to the city. We could have moved to live with my parents for a while. Anything would be better than the path I took, in my arrogance and need to provide for my family the way I decided is the way to go. The same financial independence would come, with far less stress, if I stopped to reevaluate what can be done - and talked with my wife more. When someone asks me for advice, I always say - do not risk everything for the chance of success. With family, it's family first.
[+] [-] antihero|4 years ago|reply
Wait, what? Was there some sort of conscription introduced in 2001?
[+] [-] hycaria|4 years ago|reply
[deleted]
[+] [-] kureikain|4 years ago|reply
The ability to build a SaaS, sell it as a subscription to other is amazing. Compare with our old parents, without a computer, they need a huge chunk of money to setup a biz(buying equipment, office space etc).
Especially when you're one of the erly to market(look like keygen.sh is a great one) and can move fast enough, in a market that people are willing to pay more than $50 per month, it can grow very quick.
Good job rolling it out and make it sustaisable.
[+] [-] ezekg|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] EliRivers|4 years ago|reply
I can only imagine the psychic damage done to people who hate their jobs, feel sick when they think about going in to work the next day, spending hour after hour in situations that just make them miserable, but can't get out. Can't afford to just quit. In my mind, it would feel like serving time. Feel like a prison sentence with no release date. I recognise my good fortune in life in being able to just quit; even just knowing I always have that option makes everything bad in the life of employment more bearable.
[+] [-] slfnflctd|4 years ago|reply
I've said it before and I'll say it again, I would rather be homeless than trapped in a job that's making me miserable with no end in sight. It's dehumanizing.
Of course, many people don't have that choice (I may not either if serious medical issues come up)-- there is no doubt in my mind this causes terrible suffering and contributes to many suicides.
[+] [-] c_o_n_v_e_x|4 years ago|reply
My problem now is that I have no shortage of ideas, I'm interested in everything. I find it hard to focus and I'm paralyzed with so many ideas. I question whether I should have ever given up the service business!
Hats off to Mr.Keygen for making the plunge. Your success is motivation for a lot of us!
[+] [-] thiscatis|4 years ago|reply
I used to be in this position but then I actually became pretty passionate about making sure startups can make it through the growth phase and still deliver.
[+] [-] yuy910616|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] yen223|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] bserge|4 years ago|reply
When everyone around you shits on you and belittles everything you do, you're playing on expert mode.
[+] [-] ezekg|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] KennyBlanken|4 years ago|reply
This blog post basically no different from the other "so I did X and now I'm a big success" anecdotal LinkedIn/Medium/Tweet thread posts.
Not everyone is allowed to break gender roles.
Edit: not going to promise this is the best reference/source, but it is at least one: https://time.com/4425061/unemployment-divorce-men-women/
[+] [-] sergiotapia|4 years ago|reply
I wouldn't be the person I am today or have the success I have without my supporting wife.
Thank you for sharing OP!
[+] [-] mxuribe|4 years ago|reply
1. My lack of skills as a lead salesperson. I'm really effective at many roles - both for enterprise and start up (e.g. - CTO, dev, BA, product mgr, project mgr, etc.)...but when it comes to selling/sales...wow, do i suck...at least as the lead. I'm really good as a wingman/second banana...but to get leads, or close that deal as the lead salesperson...well, that has been my greatest weakness...and honestly one that i've never desired to be good at...but then if i were to go into business for myself, i would either need to improve, or get a partner who is good at that.
2. Secondly, the cost of health care - at least in the U.S. (where i live/work). I'm able to bring lots of other costs down (home mortgage or apartment rent, etc.), but not health care...at least not for my family's needs (*NEEDS*, not wants!). So, if/when i were to go into business full-time for myself, i would need to ensure i can cover such costs...and that makes things quite difficult...especially as per my point #1 above.
...Which is all to state that i'm highly respectful and in awe for folks who *can* make it on their own. Kudos to the post author, and to anyone else who can make it happen!
[+] [-] lolpython|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] ezekg|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] mastazi|4 years ago|reply
I went through this at least 3 times now, and I don't know how to break the cycle. I probably never will.
[+] [-] secondcoming|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] ajkjk|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] ezekg|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] softwarebeware|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] nerdwaller|4 years ago|reply
[+] [-] dcchambers|4 years ago|reply
Congrats and good luck!