[citrusx]

My take: Start by talking to a therapist.

The question that it sounds like you want to answer is, "What am I missing?" Going minimal may help, but it also may not. The first step is to identify the problem that is causing you to feel the way you do, and that will open up avenues for solving that problem.

Speaking with a well-trained neutral/impartial intermediary is likely the best and fastest way to identify where your misery is originating from.

Advice for what to do beyond that is kind of like taking shots in the dark, without knowing what you're really solving for. The suggestions in the rest of the thread might be good, but I'd save them for when you have a clearer picture of what the problem is. Then, it'll be more obvious which techniques are worth trying.

Good luck!