[tsupiroti]

> We could agree that marriage, everywhere in the Western world, is declining in popularity, and non-marital cohabitation rising. This is especially true of Europe.

In my experience, many young couples in western Europe don't see marriage as signifying that a relationship is stabler. It's something you just do after you've been living together for a while since it simplifies some bureaucracy (especially if moving outside the EU) and it's a good reason to have a party. In many countries being in a domestic partnership is very similar to being married from a legal perspective.

[mduerksen]

That doesn't fit my experience at all (I'm from Germany).

As soon as couples start to have concrete plans for children (or children are already on their way), marriage suddenly becomes very relevant for many relationships, and is often demanded by at least one side of the partnership.

This puts aside the romanticised view of marriage (which might be perceived equivalent to living together) and points to a more fundamental reason for marriage: Securing resources for your offspring. And offspring needs a lot of resources for a long time.

In the end, its commitment that counts. And marriage was built for ensuring commitment as much as humanly possible, with a high barrier for abandoning.

[hef19898]

Being married makes a lot of bureaucracy around kids and so on a lot easier. Especially in case one parent dies. The legal aspects of loosing your partner are less important without a house and mortgage on it and without kids.

I agree so that marriage is, also historically, as much about economics as it is about love.

[tsupiroti]

Good point, it's indeed common for couples to get married when having children.

Still, I think what's helping ensure commitment in that case are the children, rather than the marriage. It's much easier for a married childless couple to split up than for an unmarried couple that has children.

[giantg2]

In the US, the resources for the child can just be court ordered as child support even if you were never married. So the legal commitment to the child is there regardless.

[hef19898]

Don't forget tax reasons. And yes, you can get a lot of marriage like benefits by registering your partnership. Notable exceptions are adoption and shared custody of children. Especially for same sex couples.

[vasco]

In 3 countries I've lived in Europe taxes are the same if you're married or not if you make a similar amount as your partner. Only when one of the partners makes much less, it ends up being "beneficial" as the one making more gets the average "pulled down" as the allowance is 2x but income isn't 2x. If both make the same, all the tax rates and allowances would generally be the same, married or not.

Most people I know in Europe that got married did it because of kids, as the bureaucracy is much simpler in terms of legal protections for the child if anything bad happens to either one of the parents.