[foxtrottbravo]

That‘s me but evermore so I‘m stuck between a rock and a hard place.

As one sibling comment - I too have noticed this: I can remember friends of my parents showing by having a good time completely spontaneously. I liked it very much.

On the other hand I’m one of those people who get irrationally upset by random visits especially when it’s from family.

I guess that’s one reason why it’s so hard for me to be happy.

[ajmurmann]

The getting upset part is interesting. I have some theories, but am curious to hear why you think it makes you upset.

[foxtrottbravo]

I really find it hard to pinpoint the exact reason. In the moment the "surprise" is what feels overwhelming. I know it's paradox because on the other hand, that's what the interaction my parents and their friends had were - little surprises.

It feels a bit like wanting a surprise gift for Christmas (contrary to something you wished to get) but then being upset because you did not get what you wished for...

I would love, to hear your theories maybe this willhelp explore that feeling a bit more