That’s actually not clear to me. Anecdotally I have often experienced the saying “opposite attract” to be true. I have had discussions with friends who hold your point of view. Of course it could also depend on how we define similarity (e.g in terms of race, ethnicity, personality type, etc.). I wonder if there’s some percentage of the population that’s wired to look outside of itself.
bityard|3 years ago
This is neither right nor wrong. As is usually the case, it's quite a bit more complicated than that.
Most people who enter a relationship with someone else prefer a partner with a significant overlap in their demographic. Especially attributes like age, race, class, culture, height, hobbies, ambitions, etc. This is not universal, of course, but it is far and away the most common case, and is supported by both research and casual observation.
The most robust romantic relationships seem to be when the two people are largely similar but whose more minor differences complement one another in a positive way. One way to summarize it: A strong team of two is more than twice as effective as a single individual. Relationships that don't last tend to be because the individuals cannot find enough common ground to be happy in the present and don't see a positive future (the most common case), or because they are _too_ similar, grow bored of the relationship and feel like they are missing out on some critical piece.
There are outlier couples who seem to do just fine despite apparently massive difference differences in personality, culture, and so forth, but they are just that: outliers.
whaaswijk|3 years ago
[1] https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2017/05/18/1-trend...