[1_1xdev]

You have the golden handcuffs on. Do you feel trapped into staying in that position? Is that also weighing on you?

While my dollar amounts were lower, I have been in a similar situation. I wasn't ready for the leadership role I was in, but they were paying me too well to leave. But this actually led to a lot of my anxiety about it. Once I realized I didn't need the extra money, things became clearer.

0. Talk to a therapist/psych. You may be depressed.

1. Assess your financial situation. How much do you NEED to achieve your goals?

2. Take leave. If the psych diagnoses you with depression, medical leave may be an option. If not, well, you can always just try to take regular unpaid leave at the risk that your job may not be there when you get back (what's your relationship with your employer/boss?). Seriously, take 3 months or more.

3. Start to look for a new job that you think you'll be HAPPY doing. If you're not happy working as a principle or a staff eng now, what makes you think your next job should be that role? You sound like you'd be happier at senior. That's fine! Maybe with more experience as a senior someplace else, you'll find that you're more prepared for the staff/principle level responsibility later on. You think you want to do senior-level work -- so go find someplace you can do senior level work, where you're happy!

Job titles are so different depending on company/industry, it may not look that weird on paper anyway. But you've already proven to yourself and others that you can get promoted and can handle more responsibility (even if at cost to your mental health). You can get there again.

[joshxyz]

well written thanks for writing this

part of me thinks though that if he gets demoted more, he will lose a lot of autonomy he's enjoying now, and that could eat him away too.