[jorgeleo]

My experience, personal and observed, of 30+ years as software engineer:

- don't directly address the point of your question / provide a much complex answer (or even worse, a non-answer) to a simple question

Simple or easy? For once, a lot of time the question oversimplified the problem that is been asked about, and reality is very nuanced. The fact that the person asking assumes that the question is simple and, on top of that, gets frustrated when it is not leads me to believe that doesn't know what is asking or that does not have the emotional maturity to manage his/her feeling. As the person provided the answer, my obligation is to give all the information necessary to understand the answer. This means removing assumptions; specially the assumptions that make believe that the question is easy. If you don't want to hear it, that is on you, not the person answering. What I don't want is later on to get "I asked you and you told me X", without me been able to say "true, within the context I explained, and the context changed"

- don't stay focused to the point of the discussion

Deflection is a good technique that a lot of people uses when trying to tell bad news to power. Other times, maybe what you are asking has origins on other places that you think are unrelated, put attention. In short, if you want to get shot accurate answers, then foster an environment around you where people feels that they can trust you with bad news, and that you are knowledgeable enough to know that what you don't know might be important. Fostering such environment is up to you, and ranting on HN is not going to help you

- don't have some level of clarity in their train of thought and speech

Or maybe it takes time to formulate an answer that can cross the listener's emotional state and reach with the piece of knowledge that is been asked for. When I see that, I need to consider if I stablish a relationship were people is confident that telling things by their name will not result in retaliation, including but not limiting to your personal frustrations.

- generally over-complicate matters by wandering off to other related subjects and extending the scope of the discussion

Ufff... 2 red flags here: "Over-complicate matters" and "other RELATED subjects". Yeah... if people feels that need to walk around you in tiptoes, and measuring what they can or cannot say to you, or how to say it, then that is you not creating trusting relationships, and venting your frustration in HN is not going to fix it.

Work at gaining people trust and feeling safe around you, then you can remove your potential lack of soft skills out of the equation, and will allow you to discover what people need to communicate more clearly with you