[dr00bot]

I definitely get the emptiness... In many ways it's totally rational to feel like this because there is no global meaning out there. Meaning only makes sense at the local level and within the confines of a project/goal. That elusive transcendent purpose can only be found within religion, which is functionally just a different kind of project.

For me, accepting this reality has been therapeutic but it doesn't help you work out what to do with your time. The search for meaning seems to be baked in to human nature so my advice would be to just choose some projects and embrace those localised meaning structures. I use the term "project" here very loosely - it could be building a game, being a better partner, travelling, improving your health, raising a child, watching all the films of Agnes Varda. Whatever!

You might ask, well what criteria should I use to choose which projects to focus on? Unfortunately there is no good answer here. If there are things you like doing or feel you want to achieve, start there. Don't take it too seriously and avoid over-analysis because humans aren't actually very good at working out what they desire anyway.

Life really is just choosing projects that resonate and focusing on them for a while. That might not feel like enough but in my experience, anyone offering more than this is probably trying to sell you something. Freedom and emptiness are just two sides of the same coin unfortunately.