[chresko]

Your question is less about restarting your career, and more about mental health. I would suggest:

1 - See a therapist. What you wrote is what you believe about yourself, and that belief may be false.

2 - Understand your previous and current behavior. It will follow you, regardless of career.

3 - Be kind to yourself. Others will criticize your career path without understanding your background or history. HN might not be the best outlet to ask for support in this area.

Yes there is hope. Yes you can 'start over.' Begin with asking for help. When you yourself believe tech will consider hiring you, tech will consider hiring you.