[MrTortoise]

Kids wont listen to you kids don't care how much you have thought about something the way you are has more to do with who you are not what you think and the way they will be is more like what you are Your kids spend most of their time with people who are not you

control and choice is an illusion that follows a chain of high pressure, highly emotional situations.

Get a dog - learn to train it. Having kids is like that - except its cleverer than you, doesn't want to make you happy all the time and wages psychological warfare to figure out how to get what it wants at all times. Or at least the fun kids that will make you wish you had a plan in retrospect will.

When you have a second kid you will do things differently - you will be wrong then too. good luck

your kids wont like what you do - they are not you and they will value different things to you.

Help them discover that and support that - unless they don't want to. they wont.

My best advice would be to get good at minecraft.