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sinity | 3 years ago

I meant that other people aren't attracted to them.

You've claimed that it's weird that these men go to these lengths to find partners, because it's supposed to be just natural for them to find them.

It's clearly not.

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runarberg|3 years ago

I see what you mean. I have no opinion on that, as that doesn’t really matter for the subject at hand.

My main point is that if you go about living a normal live, attend social functions, or just see other people on a regular basis, most people will be attracted to some of the people they meet along the way. What I’m getting at, is there is no skill nor effort needed, nothing needs to be carefully evaluated and planned. These attractions just arise naturally for most people. So altering your life course to maximize some chances of attraction, that is weird.

Tozen|3 years ago

Comes off like a rich person ignoring and walking over poor homeless people begging for food. Then when asked about it, has no understanding for how such circumstances could occur nor empathy. This would be willful obliviousness or tone deafness about the circumstances and plight of others.

> ...go about living a normal live, attend social functions, or just see other people on a regular basis, most people will be attracted to some of the people they meet along the way.

It is more of a feminine perspective and privilege to wait and hope random luck will take care of romantic matters, because mostly, males pursue females. Many women are able to get attention, as a matter of biology. Ignorance or purposely ignoring the mechanics of what is occurring in the background, with regard to why this attention exists and how it shapes the dynamics, can lead to distorted and misplaced views.

Furthermore there are clearly great numbers of people (male and female) that are shy, fear rejection or embarrassment, are socially awkward, or at some disadvantage in social settings. To pretend otherwise, seems to be making a concerted effort to remain oblivious.

> What I’m getting at, is there is no skill nor effort needed, nothing needs to be carefully evaluated and planned.

That is not a perspective many others share and when people are specifically and repeatedly saying this is not the case, it's not helpful to blatantly ignore them. For various people, and more so for men, they do need various levels of knowledge, skill, effort, and/or planning.