[gptgpp]

As the premier Ivy League authority on the inner-workings of Cartels, I can definitively say that our illustrious Ivy League institutions only happen to appear like a Cartel to the very, very stupid and uneducated (eg. People who couldn't attend).

It is quite an amazing psycho-social phenomena, inextricably linked to a low SES and impoverished social capital; I hope to secure a grant to make my PhD students shit out a bunch of papers with my name on it soon.

Don't worry, all the confounding variables have been accounted for. We can't release any raw data though, so sorry but it's to protect confidentiality. Could we reasonably anonymize the data? Oh nooooo, I'm so sorry you're breaking u --