[aaronscott]

I was curious for a summary of what the book suggested. Here is Kagi’s summarizer:

- Emotional maturity and stability are key traits for a happy marriage. People who are well-adjusted, have good self-confidence, and can handle problems well tend to have more successful marriages.

- Communication and companionship are vital for a happy marriage. Couples need to develop a strong bond through sharing interests, aspirations, and conversations.

- Compatibility and similar traits between partners promote marital happiness. Couples who have similar personalities, backgrounds, and interests tend to get along better.

- Sexual satisfaction and intimacy are important for a fulfilling marriage. Couples need to develop a good sexual relationship and intimacy to avoid infidelity and build closeness.

- Mutual understanding, trust, and respect are crucial for a lasting marriage. Partners need to be considerate of each other's needs, supportive, and willing to compromise.

- Shared goals and values help strengthen a marriage. Couples who have common life goals and moral values tend to be more content in their relationships.

- Financial stability and compatibility aid marital happiness. Couples who manage their finances well and agree on spending habits tend to have fewer conflicts.

- Physical and mental health issues can strain a marriage. Conditions like addiction, mental illness, and disabilities require effort and understanding from both partners.

- Similar family backgrounds promote marital success. Children of happily married parents tend to have more successful marriages themselves.

- Premarital counseling can help resolve issues before marriage. Seeking advice from professionals and discussing expectations can prepare couples for the challenges of married life.

[Aachen]

Non-native speaker here. Is there a ranking to "key", "vital", "crucial", and "important", or should I read these as being equivalently important? I'm taking the latter as lesser than the former three, though that also depends on what Kagi is I suppose.

[miahwilde]

- "Vital" and "crucial" both indicate a required element.

- "Key" and "important" both indicate notable elements.

- "Key" can also be used to indicate a required element, i.e. "keystone", however it is not always used in this way.

- "Key" can also be used to indicate "there is only one" though it is not always used in this way.

When "key" is meant as "singular & required & notable" it probably carries the most weight of all these words. However, since it is not always used in that way, I personally tend to give it less weight.

In casual use I would order them like this (strongest to weakest): crucial, vital, key, important.

In formal use I would order them like this (strongest to weakest): key, vital, crucial, important.

My favorite thesaurus, ChatGPT, agrees with my casual use ranking. https://chat.openai.com/share/10bb8195-c7cd-4c0c-935f-f5b4c3...

[Brighthurst]

As a pedantic native speaker, I'd like to describe the different interpretations I have for these words. Hopefully this explanation illustrates the differences in a more useful way to you than simple ordering. I am not saying that this is exactly what the summary meant for these words, I'm just adding more context:

- Important: Describes that something has high priority, in a general sense. Very broad. Can replace any of the other terms, but is less precise.

- Key: Important in a utilitarian sense. Just like a literal key, using "key" here implies that something is an essential part of a solution to a problem/issue.

- Vital: Important in an ongoing sense. Think of "vitality"," the capacity to live, grow, or develop. We should use "vital" when we mean something is important to do as a habit, to maintain the strength of something.

- Crucial: Another term that is general. Basically "important" but with higher priority. It implies that there is some urgency, gravity, or necessity to whatever is crucial or the matter to which whatever is crucial.

[jjoonathan]

Yes, "important" is slightly lesser than "key," "vital," and "crucial," but not by a large enough margin that I would confidently infer intent beyond cycling through synonyms to keep the prose interesting.

[drewcoo]

Mostly, they're used interchangeably by native speakers.

I recommend searching the original text to see how they're used in context.

key - not used in the text

important - seems to be used when comparing things: more important or less important

vital and crucial - used in the text, both of them seeming to indicate the highest priority

[chongli]

They’re all roughly interchangeable. Reusing adjectives in English writing is generally avoided. This may be why we have so many redundant ones!

[solardev]

They are not strictly defined/quantified, especially when a summarizer is producing them

[Minor49er]

I would suggest plugging words that you are curious about into a thesaurus, then looking up the definitions of each of the entries that you find in a dictionary to further your understanding

[bobobar339]

1. Vital, Crucial 2. Key, Important

[ethanbond]

Interesting question! I think I’d agree with your ranking. Maybe important < key < [crucial or vital]

But this strikes me more as a question of author’s emphasis rather than a ranking of the actual factors in reality?

[charles_f]

Thanks, that's very helpful.

Any indication per whether this is data based or just "common sense driven"?

[judge2020]

They sometimes cite data.

> One German study showed that the fewest divorces were in marriages between Jews and that the largest number of divorces occurred when a Catholic married a non-Catholic. In Maryland, twelve thousand young people were asked the religious affiliations of their parents and also asked if their parents were living together, divorced or separated. Here were the percentage of broken marriages found in different groupings:

  When both parents Jewish 4.6%
  When both parents Catholic 6.4%
  When both parents Protestant 6.8%
  When religions mixed 15.2%

Also in "People Who Should Not Marry at All"

Also

> While, as you notice, these fiancées felt extremely reluctant to marry a man who had lost his sexual potency, only a small proportion (16%) would refuse to marry an ex-soldier who had become sterile.

But the main text is written with their own opinions and observations.