[scp3125]

Wet is a relationship between a surface and a liquid, based on the liquid's viscosity and adherence to the surface.

Where this came from, and how the conversation got this far without this point being made... I don't know

[b800h]

A random online dictionary says it means "(fully or partially) covered with water" and I hereby declare that this means that only singular water molecules are not wet.

[deprecative]

Jokes are hard and sometimes they don't make the splash we intend.