[foxtrottbravo]

Those articles by both Jake and his wive are so well written and I would love to read them fully but I can't.

It's gut wrenching that I am just a CT scan away to being in the same (somewhat comparable) situation.

I shouldn't compare fates and still my mind wanders around the topic every time.

The facts they both present in a scientific manner (like remission rates) scare me to my bone. I cannot fathom what he and his loved ones are going through and that makes it even clearer what I have burdened on my wife, children and family.

I know this comment is ultimately me shouting "please let us both live" with many words and maybe this is me being a self serving asshole, maybe it is that. I don't know anymore.

I would love to offer the promise that everything is going to be alright but I cannot. I am just scared as hell and somehow I needed to get this out.