[Mezzie]

It was my first time losing anyone/anything close to me as well.

I was acutely distressed for a good month and basically non functional for a week or so, which is embarrassing to admit, but this cat was with me through some really dark times when no people were there for me. I was holding her body and just wailing when we got home - I was a 30 something year old woman and I needed my mom to come over to manage what to actually do. There is no shame in the pain - it means you love your kitty.

[Exuma]

That makes me feel a lot better... thank you

[Mezzie]

I would recommend making arrangements for the body beforehand/having someone else around to take care of the immediate 'aftermath', as morbid as that is to think about. You aren't going to be in any shape to handle any logistics and seeing her body without 'her' in it WRECKED me.