Trabant

[dzink]

My parents drove one to their University with me in the back seat as a baby. You could buy one for 500 levs at the time which was a few months salary and it would take you from point A to point B. That said, the surface of the car was cardboard-like and thus fodder of so many jokes. Example:

- A: Are you happy with your Trabant? B: Yes, except I need to repaint it and some point. It’s blue and as soon as I open the window people start dropping letters for me to mail.

— 4 men were carrying a Trabant. Somebody asks them why? Was it broken? They reply: Nope, nothing wrong with it, we’re just in a hurry.

- A Japanese car manufacturer ordered a Trabant. When it arrived they wrote back: “We got the engine and chassé in a cardboard box, but where is the rest.

- A cop busted a Trabant driver hitting 100km per hour. The cop says: 100levs. The driver counters: another 50 and the car’s yours.

- Trabant stops next to a Lamborghini. Driver rolls down the window and asks - Hey, are you happy with your car? The Lambo driver responds “Yes, why do you ask?”. The Trabi replies: I don’t see many Lambos around, must not be a good car if people aren’t buying it.

[Cosi1125]

A man in a pharmacy:

"500 meters of advesive plaster, please."

The pharmacist looks at him, shocked. The next person in line pats him on his back and says:

"Sir, 100 meters is enough. I also have a Trabant."

[kazinator]

> A Japanese car manufacturer ordered a Trabant

The ironic thing is that the Japanese cars produced during the Trabant heydey era (60s-70s) are mostly not around any more due to having rusted.

Maybe we would see more ancient Honda Civics on the road if they used duroplast.

[pacija]

There's a song by Atheist Rap, a Serbian punk rock band, who sings about the band happily touring around Vojvodina villages in a "Blue Trabant", until one night they left it parked near a pigsty which resulted in Trabant being eaten by pigs - a reference to it being plastic. Luckily, they managed to convert an engine into a power saw for sawing firewood.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=R5YgRvIhdtk

The track was quite popular so they made another one about Wartburg.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pvG7vi3bFCY

[acherion]

If you're interested in the Trabant, the Youtube channel Aging Wheels has a couple of playlists where Robert has rebuilt the engine and gearbox of his [1] and just general videos [2] about his Trabant.

[1] - https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLzV2uljPvyAeEgAEgwYNf...

[2] - https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLzV2uljPvyAe1K8ArgPHG...

[danielam]

Doug DeMuro driving Robert's Trabant [0].

[0] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=No1-4GsQa-g

[axegon_]

My granddad used to have one up until the late 2000's. Slow, noisy, uncomfortable, stench was unbearable. But worst of all those things were the gear shifts. Funnily enough it was the first car I ever drove - I must have been like 10 or 11 (on an abandoned dirt road in the countryside, worst thing that could have happened is running over a grasshopper). I think he got it in the second half of the 80's or something like that. Those were a lot more desirable than the other soviet cars available in eastern Europe: at least finding a half-empty bottle of vodka left behind the door panels was out of the equation. As far as that region of the world, the decent(strong word) choices were Trabant and Skoda - all other cars were practically designed to decapitate you in even the lightest accident(I witnessed a fair bit of horror stories when I was a child and soviet cars were still roaming the streets). By having a Skoda or a Trabant you had some chance of survival. This was their only redeeming quality really.

[gumballindie]

Whats paradoxical though is how these vehicles lasted decades. Sure they had issues, but trabants, skodas, dacias, yugos, all worked for decades - of course they required maintenance but were so basic that anyone could do it. Somehow modern cars have all the gadgets yet fall apart once out of leasing and last 10 years at most.

[jacquesm]

That bottle would never be half empty.

[coldtea]

>Those were a lot more desirable than the other soviet cars available in eastern Europe: at least finding a half-empty bottle of vodka left behind the door panels was out of the equation.

Why not finding one would that make it more desirable? If anything, it would have doubled its value!

[zabzonk]

skoda are now pretty good and popular, in the UK at least

https://www.skoda.co.uk/new-cars/range

[kazinator]

> thing that could have happened is running over a grasshopper

If that happens to be a locust, there is a risk of rollover.

[BrandoElFollito]

Wasn't Lada or Fiat an option too?

[nimbius]

the Trabant? must be a slow day. As a diesel engine mechanic I once worked alongside a Slovenian who did our body panel work and he always had a good Trabant joke.

did you know Trabant had a luxury package where it came with dual exhaust? the feature was hailed as a revolutionary wheelbarrow with heated handles.

[jacquesm]

A man in a brand new Mercedes is driving down the highway, and then, out of nowhere his car breaks down. A little while later an older man in a Trabant pulls up and asks if he can help. I don't think so says the Mercedes owner, my car is too heavy for you to tow. "But I can drive you to the next garage", offers the man in the Trabant and the Mercedes owner accepts. Seated in the Trabant he's actually quite surprised, for such a small car, lots of leg room, a stereo, a small espresso machine and an entertainment center that makes his own car look a little shabby. Real leather seats that are amazingly comfortable and on and on. "Wow", says the Mercedes owner, I never expected Trabants to be so luxurious.

A few months later he's driving in his - now repaired - Mercedes on the autobahn, and wouldn't you know it, there is the Trabant stuck by the side of the road with smoke coming out. The Mercedes owner (who has had his car upgraded with all manner of luxury) jumps out, grabs his fire extinguisher and sprints to the Trabant intent on saving the owner. But just as he's about to let loose with the spray a voice comes out of the Trabant: "Just a second, I'll be done with my sauna shortly".

[Lutzb]

Trabant jokes were also quite popular after reunification, when the first trabants showed up in West Germany. Every kid in school knew at least some jokes. Most were centered around the atrocious build quality.

How many people does it take to build a Trabant?

Two: One folds, one glues.

[Cockbrand]

Why did the Trabant break down at the traffic light? One of the tires gut stuck on a piece of gum.

What’s the best device for measuring the Trabant‘s acceleration? A calendar.

[kazinator]

I just made one up:

When riding in a Trabant, the passengers carry most of the kinetic energy. To reduce damage to the Trabant in a collision, secure it to as many passengers as possible via seat belts.¹

--

1. Offered as an add-on option, featured in the deluxe package.

[nikolay]

Trabant was the cardboard version of Zaporozhets [0] and the little brother of Wartburg [1].

Another Bulgarian jokes about Trabant:

- It is that it's the longest car in the world... if you take the smoke trail behind it.

- A truck was heavily and couldn't climb a hill. A Trabant stops and suggests to pull it over the hill. The Trabant keeps pulling making a huge cloud of smoke. At the top of the hill, the truck driver jokes: "See how much smoke you made!" And the Trabant driver responds: "Sorry, I forgot to release the hand brake."

[0]: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ZAZ_Zaporozhets

[1]: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wartburg_(marque)

[btbuildem]

That car had such a ridiculous, distinct sound.. kind of like an empty tin can rolling down an uneven rocky slope: https://www.tiktok.com/@hanneshobbygarage/video/718589878988... (apologies for the destination of that link)

[imartin2k]

My parents had one, sedan version, in the late 80s. Their first car. I remember when we did a Sunday trip and entered the highway section. When the sign said “100” (km/h), my father said “FIRE”, as in “let’s gooo”, and the pushed the car to its limits (with all the noise and heavy exhaust gases this meant). It became somewhat of a family meme every time we entered the highway.

[petabytes]

How do you double the value of a Trabant? You fill the tank up.

[danielodievich]

They were called "soap containers" (мыльница) by people in Russia (although they weren't allowed in afaik) because many soap containers were made of cheap plastic and that is what this car was made out of. It also smelled like it too. Lots of them in Poland back then...

[slavoingilizov]

My parents had one. My dad’s first car and I think the first one I drove too. I have a photo in front of it as a baby. It lasted until I was 16 to drive it, so draw your own conclusions. In the 80s Bulgaria, you had to wait 5-10 years to buy anything else and my dad just got a Trabant instead. We’ve been everywhere across the country with it. Plenty of jokes of course. A few other neighbors had one, and people would prank them by lifting and moving it overnight when parked to a different parking spot, it only needed a few strong men.

[hestefisk]

I recall visiting Budapest in 1989 and going for a ride in a Trabant taxi. As my dad opened the door and grabbed the roof top with his hand to get out of the taxi, a small piece of the taxi roof top cracked off. We still have it at home as a souvenir.

[alamortsubite]

The last time I was in Berlin there was an outfit renting them to tourists for joy rides. My girlfriend talked me down, but in the future if she's not there to help me resist temptation...

[jillesvangurp]

That still exists; it's called the Trabi Safari. I live there and I regularly see, hear, and smell them. Apparently, they have some kind of exemption for pollution rules because otherwise these things are no longer allowed on the streets. The exhaust fumes are nasty.

But driving them is a fun thing to do if you have the chance. I did that a few times with visitors and very much enjoyed that.

[seabass-labrax]

There are in fact at least two different companies offering tourists Trabants-for-hire in Berlin. Be careful though, as one company has an excellent reputation and another has a terrible reputation, apparently!

[radicality]

I did this exact thing like ten years ago! Was a corporate sponsored event so not sure how much it was and whether I would pay myself, but I do remember it was quite fun!

[tr14]

Oh I remember these so bad! There were either Skoda or Trabant in Slovakia in early 90s.

[mrlonglong]

I remember these cars flooding into the West after reunification. My father was absolutely delighted that the Berlin wall was finally down. Best to consign them to history although there are plans for an electric trabant.

[slau]

I participated in a rally with Trabants through Budapest. Some people would get excited to see us rally the cars. Some would honk, others would wave. A lot of the traffic would let us through.

On the dashboard, there was a sticker to remind us not to go beyond 50km/h. I think on the final stretch we hit 100. The whole car was shaking, it felt as if the tyres were about to come off. Great fun.

[vr46]

There’s a Trabant Museum and nearby theme park in Berlin - I may be using these terms a tad loosely - and there’s one around the corner parked in front of an art gallery and it is occasionally resprayed and redesigned according to the whims of the gallery - and I suspect the paint is the only thing holding it together.

This car is basically a kid’s drawing meeting origami

[_visgean]

There is a grouup of czechs that used trabant to travel around the world: https://tv.apple.com/cz/movie/trabant-at-the-end-of-the-worl...

[pax]

There was also Trabant Trek (2007/2008) - Berlin to Phnom Penh, with 4 trabbies (only 3 made it). An assistance Mercedes Benz was also lost on the way.

https://danmurdoch.blogspot.com/ https://m.imdb.com/title/tt1974104/

[xkekjrktllss]

"This content is no longer available"

[i_am_a_peasant]

My father had 3 of these babies. It was cheaper to get another trabby and scrap it for parts than to try to hunt down the car parts market for replacement parts for your main trabby.

The whole neighborhood would wake up when you would turn on this thing and we actually would go on vacations in it. We were reaching 100km/h and the whole thing was vibrating so bad it felt like it was gonna come apart.

I remember how wholesome it was for 2 trabant drivers to wave to one another as they passed each other on the road. And there was always a sense of camaraderie and solidarity between them. We a few times stopped in the middle of nowhere next to people whose trabant car broke down. Either ran out of gas or some engine problem and my dad would fix it for them or give them enough gas to get them to the next station.

Good times.

[tdullien]

My parents (west German) drove Ladas, first one bought in the late 70s (which was actually reasonably solid, built under license from Fiat. Came with a large very solid cast iron set of tools, and a big pot of paint in the right color). Fully metal bumpers.

My mother got into an accident with a Ford that totaled the Lada (and the Ford).

They bought the same model again, but at this point Soviet manufacturing had deteriorated and that car was nothing but trouble.

I do remember annual 2000km trips to the french coast though...