[PodgieTar]

I get that feeling of feeling like everyone is faking being happy, and I'm glad that you've found a way to overcome it.

For me, I've always struggled with being overly cynical. I can't let nice moments be, and I can't let accomplishments lie.

I feel like I'm somewhere on the journey you are on, and I hope to get to the same destination.

[Cthulhu_]

I'm no psychologist but I share the sentiment, a feeling of "this'll all end up in tears anyway". From the point of view of attachment theory, it may be related to avoidant attachment; don't get too attached to nice moments, accomplishments, good times because something will go wrong.

I'm fairly sure I'm in the avoidant quadrant; as to what caused it, I'm not entirely sure but the things that fit are that my mother was very ill when I was 3 (thrombosis, she spent a few days in ER), and that a friend who sort of "saved" me from being all alone at school just left one day (her parents moved), which re-emphasized my already present feeling of "shouldn't get too attached". The rest was probably self-inflicted, feelings of superiority / being more mature than the other kids, fear of rejection, etc. But it adds up and resulted in growing up awkward, immature, single, boring, etc. I'm 38 now and have been through some mental health stuff, but it's expensive (since it's not clinical) and ultimately pointless unless I throw my life around, become a more social person, and get a lot more reinforcement that I'm wrong and my cynicism is not justified. But instead I get reinforcement that I'm not wrong. To a point that becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, but at the same time society is going through a loneliness crisis and focused on individuality, so... I'm not wrong?

Anyway; avoidant attachment theory, have a look.