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opprobium | 1 year ago

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jncfhnb|1 year ago

No, that doesn’t make sense. And writing it off as an illogical cultural problem is just lazy. I’ll believe these guys are assholes. I don’t believe they’re just consistently idiots. If the men refused to acknowledge that they had HIV and refused to allow their wives to get prep, then the logical consequence is that the wife gets HIV and the men are forced to confront the fact that either the husbands themselves have HIV or the wife is cheating and got it from someone else.

It seems much more likely that the husbands refuse to allow their wives to get prep out of spite. The implication of infidelity angle does not feel plausible.

Otherwise the men are setting themselves up for a lose:lose scenario regardless of what the wife does.

opprobium|1 year ago

"the men are forced to confront the fact..." No they aren't, they simply never confront it. People go to their graves denying that they have HIV, denying that they ever tested positive, denying that a positive HIV test has anything to do with illness.

"Otherwise the men are setting themselves up for a lose:lose scenario regardless of what the wife does." - Of course.

I mean, the most rational win:win thing to do is to get an HIV test and get treated if positive. They then both don't get sick and die and can't pass along HIV. Many people don't do that either. What's the mindset that explains this behavior? You can't work backwards from the most rational thing to do to what people actually do.

cubefox|1 year ago

> From the perspective of the husband, the woman taking prep implies she is cheating.

But that only makes sense if the husband thinks his wife doesn't believe he has HIV.

vlovich123|1 year ago

>> You're digging for a logical explanation for a fundamentally illogical cultural problem and you aren't going to get it.

> But that only makes sense if

Reread and if you’re still not getting it, keep rereading your parent’s line that I highlighted for you.