[dfreire]

Thank you. This is very different from my own experience and I find it fascinating.

My thoughts are mostly verbal. I do hear an inner voice all the time. I cannot easily catch the moment before words start to form. This excessive wordiness often leads me to a negative experience, it’s relatively easy to fall down on a spiral, worrying to much, going over and over about all the things that can go wrong. I just wish I had the ability to stop. I’m looking into meditation because of this.

[interroboink]

I agree, it's a very interesting topic (:

One bit of research that stuck with me is the "split brain" experiments in the 1960s [1][2]. There do seem to be multiple different "personalities" at work, fairly independent of each other, with different strengths and weaknesses. The idea of a non-speaking but more spatial/visual consciousness in the right half of the brain resonates with me. The verbal side does seem to be reluctant to give up control, sometimes[3].

For me, on some low level, I've always wanted to be comfortable in my own skin, so I feel like my various parts can ultimately agree on that goal, and it helps avoid conflict. There is some level of self-trust that's required for wordy-me to give up some control to the bigger, quieter, less predictable me(s).

I definitely feel like I understand what you mean about the spiral of worrying and I too associate that with the wordy/controlling part of myself, somewhat. I wish you luck on trusting yourself(s) and releasing that grip a bit, from time to time.

[1] Some direct footage: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aCv4K5aStdU

[2] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Split-brain

[3] A book that theorizes about broader implications of this stuff (I haven't read it myself) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Master_and_His_Emissary