[clickzyn]

Hi Gremlinsinc, First of all, I'm impressed, you're a real fighter . Everyone is different, so it's possible that my approach might not fit perfectly with what you need.

Usually, when I want to get through trauma, I stay occupied with activities that I love and give myself time (sometimes several years). I'm introverted, so I recharge my batteries by doing activities like running, learning a new language or skill, cooking, or cleaning. Once my batteries are recharged, I'm able to accept that I'm human and it's normal to experience these emotions.

My next step is similar to what you did in this message. If the trauma is too big, I share my thoughts and reflections with people I trust. When they share their thoughts, I only take what I think fits my situation.

For me, it takes time and effort to work through trauma. I stay patient, trust the process, and keep fighting. I love fighting .

[gremlinsinc]

I started learning guitar, and can play a bunch of songs.. (1 hour per day)...oddly I've been able to focus on that... everyday since April... It's very therapeutic as it makes me stop thinking so much.

[clickzyn]

Wow amazing, guitar seems an excellent idea. Can I borrow your idea?

[squidgedcricket]

Are you trying to convince the OP to end their life?

A high-functioning BPD sufferer can learn to be aware of behaviors that negatively impact others and minimize them. OP is likely an individual like that.

Don't take hope from the hopeless.

[mmooss]

You seem to have a lot of pain but this is no place or way to act on it. I hope you find something better for yourself and for others.

> feral dog

Whose behavior seems out of control on this page?

[taurath]

Stop that. You are projecting the pain that you suffered at the hands of an abuser onto someone you have never met.

Dehumanizing someone who is seeing a therapist and seeking help online trying to seek help is both legitimately unhelpful, and also actively harms people in recovery by casting doubt on whether getting help will help them get better.

Abusers with BPD exist, abusers without BPD exist. Abusers are abusers, being diagnosed with BPD doesn't make you an abuser. People with BPD are, almost definitionally, people who've been abused or clinically neglected, and are likely to be abused in adulthood as well.

https://www.manchester.ac.uk/about/news/borderline-personali...

Finally, BPD is a set of symptoms, not a cause - for this reason, its a pretty contested diagnosis with a lot of stigma attached. Its often more accurate to think of it as a trauma disorder. 50% of people with BPD don't meet the clinical criteria (aka they don't have BPD) after 10 years in many studies - if it were truly an unchangeable thing, those numbers would not be possible.