[idamantium]

I have studied funeral design. One of the most inspiring funeral directors I interviewed (https://www.zenithvirago.com/) had a particular specialty for suicides. She was keen on ensuring the parents had a healthy and complete mourning process. This almost always involved insisting that they get up to speak at the funeral, to the point where she lends her body to help them stay standing through the process. At least by her own accounting, it has a profoundly positive effect on how the parents get through this grief that I can hardly imagine. It's an opportunity that doesn't return.

She teaches that when it comes to death and dying and supporting other going through the process, be present, neutral, kind, and courageous. It is hard and awkward to get up to speak. And no shame in not doing it, especially as a more distant connection. But also a lot of good can come from it as well.