[PorterBHall]

Personally, becoming a dad was the single best thing that ever happened to me. I haven’t loved every minute of it, but it added abundant love and purpose to my life and gave me what I didn’t know I needed. My only regret is that I didn’t do it sooner.

But I’ve been lucky in this regard. I was deeply conflicted going into it. But all of that doubt left me the moment I first held him in my arms. I don’t know if circumstances were different whether I would’ve had the same experience.

And the scariest part about becoming a parent is that there’s no way for you to try it out. I had been an uncle for decades before becoming a parent. Those experiences are not the same.

The choice to become a parent, or to not become a parent, is one of those choices in life that requires a leap of faith. There’s no way to explore the counter factual.

But, for those of you on the fence, let me say this. We all come from a long line of parents. I believe that there are certain rewards placed in our brain by evolution that are only unlocked by becoming a parent. Nothing can help you understand your parents and the love you did or didn’t receive from them quite like loving your own child.

[IAmBroom]

> The choice to become a parent, or to not become a parent, is one of those choices in life that requires a leap of faith.

No, it requires sticking one's gonads inside another's gonads and agitating briefly, during a not-rare selection window.

We don't come from a long line of voluntary parents. I had zero of them, directly.

I still agree that being a parent is an amazing, life-transforming event that has gigantic potential upsides. But it also has gigantic potential downsides, including financial ruin, lifelong misery, and/or sudden death (for at least one of the parents).

All I'm saying is: most of our ancestors didn't choose anything when they rubbed cloacae.

[PorterBHall]

Fair point. We _currently_ exist in a time of choice, but that is only due to the recent availability of effective birth control methods. Some choose to do it the old fashioned way and let the fates decide when and if they become parents.