(no title)
GavCo | 8 months ago
Research:
- https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3354773/ – Low self-esteem + rejection hurts self-control
- https://selfdeterminationtheory.org/SDT/documents/2007_Power... – Self-criticism predicts less goal progress
- https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9916102/ – Social exclusion slows inhibitory control
- https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1191... – Low teen self-esteem → poorer self-control
- https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8768475/ – Meta-analysis links shame to regulation drops
- https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28810473/ – Self-compassion boosts self-regulation
- https://www.researchgate.net/publication/312138882_Self-Cont... – Ego threats deplete self-control resources
- https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21632968/ – Self-criticism tied to worse goal progress
- https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-025-96476-8 – Low self-respect → low self-control → problems
Remember to be kind to yourself.
hodder|8 months ago
The research stands, but the practical application of his app is based on a Positive Punishment operant conditioning.
haswell|8 months ago
That is not a psychologically healthy way to frame this.
And I think it’s a stretch to say that screaming “I’m a loser” is positive punishment, which seems just as likely to reinforce negative self beliefs that lead to the outcomes described in the parent comment’s research and opposite of what the user presumably wants.
To your point, just flipping this around to “I’m a winner” doesn’t seem quite right either. But more importantly, reinforcing the idea that “I’m a loser” seems counterproductive either way.
stared|8 months ago
Why are you drinking? — the little prince asked.
- In order to forget — replied the drunkard.
- To forget what? — inquired the little prince, who was already feeling sorry for him.
- To forget that I am ashamed — the drunkard confessed, hanging his head.
- Ashamed of what? — asked the little prince who wanted to help him.
- Ashamed of drinking! — concluded the drunkard, withdrawing into total silence.
---
What helps is self-forgiveness and being gentle towards oneself. (I also was in the mode of guilt-tripping myself; and still, I do that often. But it does not help.)
jigarjain|8 months ago
packersville|8 months ago
- Bruce Lee
ljm|8 months ago
There needs to be a healthier alternative to that replaces the social media habit, that is reinforced by enjoying it. I do this by reading books I wouldn’t normally read, which also gives me a reason to browse indie bookshops.
unknown|8 months ago
[deleted]
janalsncm|8 months ago
snek_case|8 months ago
jlongr|8 months ago
jerf|8 months ago
Yelling "I'm a loser" too much reminds me of that, though on a different level of the "brain stack". I get the sentiment, and I understand the somewhat playful intent, but quite seriously I'd suggest something more neutral at the very least. Maybe it's completely harmless, but that's clearly the best case scenario, and it goes down hill fast after that. "First, do no harm" strikes me as relevant here, and important as ever.
egypturnash|8 months ago
"social media is for losers, and I'm a winner!"
might be both comedic and positive?
Maybe that's a little too close to the WINNERS DON'T USE DRUGS! splash screens that dominated the video games of my youth. We all snickered at those and I don't think it made a bit of difference. Dunno. Heck of a thing to holler when you're on the bus or whatever before you can get your fix, that's for sure.
toss1|8 months ago
But screaming "I'm a winner" doesn't do it either, and is perhaps even more undermining
Everyone knows if you yourself have to say "I'm randomPositiveAttribute", whether it is "winner", "genius", "brilliant", "good-looking", etc., you are NOT that — you are just a loser trying to tell everyone you are somehow a winner.
Perhaps the best thing to yell is the most straightforward — "Unlock Social Media Now!". It doesn't overtly characterize you, it honestly exposes your weakness, which is probably a more powerful shaming de-motivator.
serial_dev|8 months ago
Be kind to yourself, but think through the problem before sending a week worth of research articles.
janalsncm|8 months ago
patcon|8 months ago
Then you could make it so the pain was in leaving to go back to other work, so you'd enter knowing it would not be an easy exit. (But you'd get to yell self-affirming things on exit :) )