[simonsquiff]

I had my first at 42, second at 45, and about to have my third at 48. Honestly it’s been fine - thinking that people might find this unimaginable is so far from my reality. It really feels like I’ve had the same experience as those in their 30s.

Part of this might be that 40s life is a bit more chill anyhow - I no longer go and get smashed every weekend, or even have the FOMO that I’m not doing that. And work life, whilst more junior, was ultimately more extreme in my 20s and 30s. So any physical drop is probably balanced by a slight drop in general burning the candle at both ends. But yeah, don’t think 40s parenting is a no go. Go for it!

[nightshift1]

My parents had me at 40. I wish they had me sooner. They were old and tired for all my life and at 40 my last parent is already near the end. I have only known one of my grandparents. My parents were the equivalent of other kids grandparents. You do you but i think it's selfish.

[prawn]

I think consider that simonsquiff may not have been in a position (stable relationship, reliable personal situation, partner's career, etc) until their 40s. If not now, they may not have had children at all, leaving no one to know any grandparents.

I think there are advantages either way. I have three kids, born when I was 35-41; when my wife was 31-37. The children met great-grandparents, get lots of experience with their grandparents, and I think time for us to get more established has made for a stronger and more interesting parenting environment. I might've regretted giving up chances to travel/etc before having kids. That said, I am conscious that I would be 80+ before my youngest hit 40.

It might be that consecutive generations of late-parenting are where the impact is felt. My parents had their three children at 24-29.

[somenameforme]

Like I'm sure you can see yourself already, a lot depends on the individuals in question. I'm approaching my mid 40s and am still a gym rat - and at my peak lifetime strength + endurance levels. On the other hand I also have peers that have already muddled their minds and broken their bodies, often through years of indulgence, sometimes well before their 40s.

This [1] is RFK Jr at friggin 71 years old, amongst other athletic feats you can find videos of. He's on testosterone replacement therapy, but on the other hand I don't think that's really some big asterisk. Testosterone is absolutely critical for men and it declines as we age. When I reach the point where my testosterone has meaningfully diminished, I'll also likely do the same. And TRT alone doesn't give you results like that - that's the result of endless dedication to maintaining your health and fitness.

[1] - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UpeGjCBF_z4

[njarboe]

If your parents did not have you at 40 you would not exist. Hope you are enjoying life.