[mvid]

As an uncle, is there an opposite version of this list?

[vunderba]

Yes. It's starts and ends with Perfection.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfection_(board_game)

[Doxin]

Oh god, we've got a copy of this game somewhere. I'm pretty sure the clock is broken and runs too fast or something, because it's completely impossible to finish within the time limit. We always kept score based on how many pieces you actually got in before it exploded in your face.

A+ great game, hate to play it.

[mrbluecoat]

So true! Requires a prescription for anxiety after playing and stepping on a piece is beyond lego level pain. Thanks for scarring my otherwise happy Christmas day :D

[makeitdouble]

Pokemon cards.

Even kids who can't read yet will somewhat play with them outside of the rules. Except they're fragile, easy to lose, will bring fights and other troubles as they grow up, and cost a ton more money if they really get hooked.

[potato3732842]

1800s black powder revolver replica + starter kit of stuff. Noisy, messy, fraught with peril and danger, a little less expensive and much less cumbersome than a 1980s 3-wheeler. For ~$500 you can be the coolest uncle ever and if the parents take it the kid will resent that for life.

[mft_]

If in doubt, buy a musical instrument.

Or paint. Or glitter.

[paulryanrogers]

Warning: once glitter enters your home it will never leave. You may have to move.

[bhaak]

Kinectic sand is the modern subtle version of glitter.

[burnt-resistor]

Glitter is crafting with herpes.

[hi_hi]

A cooking kit.

Usually cake baking of some kind. The kids will get bored after the initial mess making part, but will be expecting a yummy treat at the end, so the parent has to see the whole thing through, _and_ clean up the mess.

For an added bonus, the kid then eats the sugary treat, and they have that to deal with.

[burnt-resistor]

Aren't the choices straightforward, or looking specific product links?

Generally:

- Robots with lights that make nonstop loud noises without helping with household chores

- Glue

- Glitter

- Finger paint

- Bass guitar, drum kit, or trombone

- Baking cookbooks

- Things worse than IKEA flat packs with zillions of tiny, fragile pieces like laser-cut wood models

[mcphage]

Don’t forget noisy. Have you considered an Otamatone?

[pavel_lishin]

The ideal "fuck you, parents" present must be noisy, and yet must require no batteries. Drums & cymbals are a good choice, as is a vuvuzela or an Aztec death whistle.

[rjsw]

If you don't like your siblings, how about a drum kit?

[petesergeant]

that dispenses Thai energy drinks

[jerkstate]

Anything that makes noise; squeaky toys, fart sound generators, lazer guns, etc

[cosmicgadget]

Any sort of goo or slime.