[4gotunameagain]

It's not very wrong unfortunately. Do you remember back in school that the nice, timid guys were friendzoned but the assholes always had girls after them ?

There must be some evolutionary justification, but we have to live with that unfortunate reality..

[interloxia]

A different explanation that rings true to my experience is that people are drawn to confidence rather than a desire to be abused.

Toxic abusers and high school garbage are good at signalling strength despite their poor character and choices.

[LorenPechtel]

Confidence and power.

And all too often they don't recognize until too late that that power will be turned on them.

[4gotunameagain]

Sure, that also must be a factor.

But then again remember the incredible amounts of fan mail serial killers and serial rapists get while in prison. (this is taking it to the extreme of course)

It is the same like guys finding toxic sociopaths attractive, against our better judgement.

[Tzela]

No, I do not remember that because I've seen different things. There is a lot of different things going on, like perceived confidence. This is just myth. There is no woman out there who wants to live in fear.

[fc417fc802]

"[ Indirectly ] drawn to X [ due to trait Y ]" is not the same as "directly desires X". You are strawmanning the other party.

The OnlyFans example can be twisted in a similar manner.

[brabel]

It’s not a myth. What convinced you that there is a myth?? Almost everyone seems to agree it’s a real thing from what I see online. I recommend you watch this video by YouTube channel @Elephantintheroom https://youtu.be/Gvj8hG2UvbA?si=qz_7aC4jYq2CBfJl

Apparently it’s much worse than what we see around us. Women literally fall in love with monsters.

[rnewme]

No one said there were.

[habinero]

> nice, timid guys were friendzoned

There's a reason why "nice guy" is a stereotype. The people who describe themselves like this aren't nice or timid, but insecure, angry and judgmental. They tell stories like "women like assholes" to avoid coming to terms with the idea that they're unlikable.

[LorenPechtel]

Note that "insecure" is not incompatible with "nice" and "timid". Doesn't make them unlikable.

And it's not that women like assholes. Rather, people (not just women) like the traits that let an asshole get away with being an asshole.

[butlike]

1,000,000% this

[bloppe]

Just take off those glasses and everyone will realize you're secretly hot

[4gotunameagain]

Oh this is not a spiteful view of the world, I've been quite lucky with my love life, thanks.