The descriptions behind this worry does not echo strongly in me.
I grew up in a family without much money. I decided that the best solution to reduce expenses was to not ask for things. I didn't tell my parents about this because telling them might lead to them having more stress about money.
To give you some idea, everyone month or so we went out to dinner at a restaurant. That was so exciting for my sister and me. The restaurant? Burger King. Compare to the essay, where it says "we ate at McDonalds three times in two days" Jim Anthony's 6 year old is in a very different demographic than I was.
As an older kid, I might sometimes get a few quarters to play a video game (this was the 1980s), and I would spend 30 minutes watching others play, to make sure the quarter was worth it. I got my entertainment also by watching the screens and thinking about how it might be played.
I did get an allowance. It wasn't much. I didn't often ask for my allowance, since that would have been less money for the family. I recall I could get extra money for taking out the garbage or mowing the lawn. Perhaps not coincidentally, those are the two household tasks I now dread.
When I went off to college (full scholarship in a state school, including room and board, for doing well in school and on the PSAT - doing homework is free), I kept track of every single expense, down to a nickle used to make a photocopy. If any activity cost money, I avoided doing it.
I'm lead to believe that my viewpoint is not uncommon among those growing up without much money. It's not a fun feeling. My response still, when money is tight, is to shut down and do nothing.
Mind you, that's not the same as budgeting. Budgeting is spending for things that are worth it, and affordable. What I learned was to not spend.
Except for the parents mentioned in #11, I don't empathize with the comments.
Take #13. "It suggested an allowance of sorts, but it also required the children to cover the costs of some everyday necessary items, not just snacks, McDonalds or video games…more like clothes, shoes, haircuts, etc."
That wouldn't have worked for me. I didn't have the spending money for snacks, etc., and I would wear clothes and shoes until they had holes in them, and basically had to be ordered to get a haircut and new clothes. (See above, under "not spend money.") Actually, more like my mother had to drag me.
The essay starts with a strange observation about "blue collar", based on physical types. The entire essay can be seen as expressing a decades-old class-based upper-middle class anxiety.
Your experience mirrors mine to a large degree. I think most intelligent kids know their family's financial situation, and adjust accordingly. I didn't even ask for name brand clothing or toys because 1) I knew we couldn't afford them, and it would put stress on them, and 2) years of life in this environment made me not care about such frivolities. Kids aren't stupid, they learn proper spending behavior by what they see. I saw my parents buy bare necessities and working hard jobs. Naturally, I learned a hard work ethic and proper spending habits (barring a few years of excess in college when I started making actual money and felt it should be spent).
Right now we make good money (gotta love computing), and because of my habits the money fight is nonexistent in our family. If anything, I find myself constantly fighting to buy our kids less crap. I saw both kinds of kids growing up, and it's a really interesting thing to see how they are now as thirty-somethings. Many of the kids like me are in my boat now - even those who don't have education and professional jobs. Kids who got everything are now suffering in the current economy. It's a stark and obvious difference, at least where I'm originally from.
It's a nice life this way. I like getting a bunch of money for Christmas, and splurging on a tea mug and a set of digital calipers. Everything else is invested in the hope of early retirement. I hope my kids can see what I'm doing and do the same.
I had a completely different reaction (I related to this article very well. http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-5-stupidest-habits-you-devel...). My family didn't just have a lack of money we also had regularity problems with it. Short cycles (6 months on and off) of being employed or unemployed and it causes me issues with relating to money to this day.
I learned that when you get money you spend it as quickly as you can on the nice-to-haves or mostly-nessicary stuff because money will literally disappear from under your fingers on paying bills and buying food.
My favorite holidays growing up were Christmas and Tax-refund day. That's how my family got our first, second and third computers.
When my dad was employed he used to give me a generous (for the 80's) allowance of $20/week, but it rarely lasted more than a couple weeks.
I'm only now getting my finances straight because I can afford to and I'm spending countless hours reading personal finance books and articles and I've had a friend that grew up learning the value of money and he showed me it's power.
Interesting. I grew up in an (upper-)middleclass household, but feel much the same. I always got enough allowance from my parents, we had nice holidays and nice christmas presents. I got through university and into my first job without ever having real money issues. However, I hate to spend money (and I hated to ask my parents for it - even though they would have had no problems giving it to me). I am the kind of guy how books the cheapest hotel in town, avoids a museum if the entrance fee seems unreasonable and drives the cheapest bike (per km) on the market, even though it is my main mean of transportation. Am I just a cheap person? Maybe. But I give reasonable amounts of money for charity every month, and I guess I am not cheap when buying presents. It's just this inner feeling that "cost efficiency" is the holy grail in life. Never ever will I order the expensive steak, no matter the class of the restaurant.
On the other hand, you hear all these stories of lower-class lottery winners, that are unable to keep a fortune at least for a decade or two - so I guess thats an aspect of personality deep-wired within us...
Wow thanks for sharing. My experience was somewhat similar. While my parents earned plenty of money they preferred to save it for things like college. They were very frugal and stressed out about money and I adopted an attitude of not asking for things. I also remember being actively discouraged by my mom when I spent my own money on ice cream at the pool because she thought it was frivolous.
I'm lead to believe that my viewpoint is not uncommon among those growing up without much money. It's not a fun feeling. My response still, when money is tight, is to shut down and do nothing.
Your writeup echoes my childhood really well and largely my approach to budgeting.
I will say though that I just remember it being a part of life and not something that was odd, or not nice. Even though we were poor my parents scraped and went into debt to send me to a private middle school filled with rich kids. So that was even more odd being the "poor kid" in the class and wanting to spend all my time at my friends' homes all the way across town.
I never had an allowance, but when I wanted to sell candy to my classmates my mom fronted me the 10 dollars for the initial outlay of candy. So in that regard my entrepreneurship started early as a result of just wanting to have some spending money as a kid.
Your experience resonates with me and I hadn't seen it into words until now. It's a fate that still drives me to work harder so my future kids wouldn't ever go through it.
I read that some investors have a word for it "PSD": grown up Poor, very Smart and Driven.
I agree that the article talks about more well-off families since kids whining is mostly a tactic to get what they want. If the tactic never works it wouldn't be employed.
Probably not a great idea to comment on the minor weight variations of 11 year old girls; their weight is significantly influenced by hormones. I read the whole article (my kids, both disturbingly skinny, are 12 and 14) but couldn't shake off the weird lack of empathy from that opening graf.
Teen and especially preteen girls tend to be really skinny until they put on their adult fat. I remember fitting into a size 0 at 12 and 14, same with my sister, we were both healthy.
Then I looked at my yearbook about last year and I notice something, many girls were very very skinny, just like I was at that age. Many seemed to have the same kind of body. They didn't have the more adult body I (and many others I'm sure) grew into. In an unrelated conversation I had with a friend, she was mentioning about how her body has changed since she was in high school.
"Leading by example" is one of the best, if not the best ways to teach something to your kids. Kids watch parents closely whether they are 3 years old or 13 years old, even the rebellious types. They know what you are up to as a dad/mom and will follow your lead. When it comes to money, if you are responsible yourself, odds are that your kids will probably be good with money. Having said that, there are definitely a few ways to teach them the value of money.
We were always taught to respect money. Think before you let go of it. Challenge (not haggle) spending on something. My dad always said "if you don't respect money, it will never respect you". It is also important to show your kids that money does not come free and it has to be earned just like respect.
Overall, my goal is to teach my kids these important math/formulae:
It does not matter what you make but what you save.
(Cashflow IN > CashFlow OUT) = "Financially happy".
While growing up, my dad took me and my two sisters on a family vacation. At the beginning of the trip he handed us each $100 and told us we were free to spend the money as desired, but first we had to treat the family to a single meal.
I went first with a pizza lunch. When the waiter asked what we all wanted to drink, those $2 pops suddenly had a very real impact on my bottom line. Water would be fine for everyone!
My youngest sister opted for bagels the next morning, but it took a bit of convincing to get her to spring for cream cheese!
The other sister, being the sweetheart she is, sprang for a real meal and didn't give us too much grief.
Now we all look back and laugh at the experience, but it certainly had a very real impact in the value we place on a dollar.
As the story goes: I and a friend were walking down the street. A robber came up and demanded all of our money. I pulled $80 out my wallet, looked over to my friend and said, "oh, here's the $40 I owe you" while passing it over. The robber became so mad over this grave injustice, and demanded that my friend loan me back the $40 plus the rest of my friend's money. The robber then stole the lump sum from me. I now owe my friend $150!
In any case, I think you're missing part of the equation. Value isn't a stand-alone concept. It isn't "the value we place on a dollar" but in how much each of you values family meal time. Your youngest sister, at that time, placed a low value on it, compared to other possibilities that she could do with the money.
Give your child a monthly allowance that is 8-12 times lower than the price of something it really wants. Watch as the child saves up to be able to buy it or fails. Raise the allowance slowly as they get older, but never so high that they can buy what they want comfortably.
Let children be children, don't force them to work summers and holidays to teach them a lesson, that will come in its own time. They will have to work the rest of their lives anyway. It's better to teach them how to save instead.
Anyone ever tried giving monthly allowance of something like (allowance + $500) and then charging your kids $500/month in rent? In some sense it's silly to give them money that they'll give right back, but on the other hand going from rent-free with the parents to suddenly having to manage rent, utilities, etc. is a big jump.
I received no allowance as a kid. I was also expected to do a set of chores each week to contribute to the family. These were things like cleaning my room, washing dishes, and taking out the trash.
Beyond these, however, I could perform additional chores in exchange for small amounts of money. My mom and I agreed on a price sheet. By doing a few of them I would have the equivalent of $10 a week or so. If there was, say, a computer game I wanted, I could do additional chores for a couple of weeks to earn the money for it. They encouraged this by helping me open a savings account early on.
Every now and then I approached my mom to renegotiate the prices (effectively to ask her for a raise). If I had been doing a good job, she would usually agree to small increases. Sometimes there were items that seemed too big for the return, and I would negotiate an increase by explaining this.
My first part-time job was at 15, but I helped where I could before that for odd money here and there. I paid for my first car with savings from that job, and I also paid my way through college (with some help from my parents for room and board).
I have never been afraid to negotiate on salary.
I feel like more than any of my friends growing up, and more than many adults I know, I understand the value of money, and I give a lot of this credit to my parents.
I really depends on the personality of the kid and their environment, too. I had a good friend whose parents paid him for chores. They paid pretty good rates (like $5 for cleaning his room or a bathroom or $10 for shoveling their driveway). When he was in elementary school he worked really hard and had lots of money. Combined with generous gifts from his parents and grandparents on special occasions, he always had the very best stuff. Then, in 8th grade or so, he realized that he had enough toys. He just stopped doing any chores. If he wanted something big, he'd just put it on his Christmas/birthday list. His parents didn't have a recourse since they'd set up a system that involved rewards for every household task.
Like I said above, it depends on the kid's personality and the family's economic situation, but I think that an allowance along with an expectation of age-appropriate daily and weekly chores works better than paying for individual chores or hours.
I think this is about providing positive vs. negative incentives. My parents have never really given me any kind of regular allowance through my childhood, and very little irregular allowance (less than $50 a year) -- probably because they were poor when I was young. They got better during my teens, but that didn't improve my financial situation. They did require doing lots of house chores, though, and I would have been yelled at and punished if I didn't do them, with no reward for good behaviour.
When you was positively incentivized to do more work, I only grew up a barrier around me, and learned to totally ignore their rules, punishments, screams and their authority as a whole. Also, now I really detest the chores I was tasked with most often (vacuuming, surface cleaning, dish washing), while have no problem with ones I never had to do, like laundry or ironing.
Getting paid for household tasks suggests that the household tasks are not part of your obligation to the family itself -- that if the child didn't really want the money then they could just quit helping to mow the lawn or wash the dishes.
Getting an allowance suggests that the money is theirs to do with whatever they want. For instance, my son (11) gets an allowance but he almost never spends it. It suggests that the child's finances are (at least partly) separate from the family's. And it represents "free money" earned without working for it which may or may not be a message you want to send.
The article described putting the child in charge of a portion of the family budget. The implication is that the family operates as a commune (which most families do) and the income may be earned by the parents, but is to be spent on everyone (as needed) and puts the child in charge of a piece of that. It happens to be the part that the child cares about (McDonalds and video games) because that is age-appropriate. An older child might get a larger budget and also be responsible for paying the electric bill -- assuming that they can influence it by helping to turn off lights and minimize wasteful use of electricity.
I remember as a child the first time understanding the gravitas of significant amounts of money. My parents had helped me save up with chores, birthday money, etc. to the point where I could now afford the thing I always wanted: a Nintendo 64.
I remember going to Toys R Us to buy it and when I got there, for the first time in my life, I wasn't so sure about spending the money. There was so much effort tied to it that, even as a child, it struck me that I was trading all of this time and effort for this one product. My mom made me count out each $20 bill, teaching me that money was not some nebulous idea (looking at you credit cards). Every $20 bill I counted made me think more about what I was doing.
I eventually bought it, but because all of the time spent saving up for it, I took good care of it and found it to be the most beloved console I ever owned. I feel that this experience definitely helped me understand the value of money relative to my efforts.
Oh, and my mother bought me Starfox 64 specifically to nail the point home. If you are reading this, mom, I love you.
Teaching kids about personal finance is important, but making your kids pay for large expenses isn't a good thing. I've seen so many kids start out life having to pay for their own car, insurance, and college. Most of them drop out of school before graduating (no degree and student loans). There's nothing wrong with helping your children get started in life by paying for the things that will financially cripple them.
Well, if we're trading anecdotes, several kids I know whose parents paid for their car, paid for college, etc. did not value these contributions and drove recklessly and wrecked their car, did poorly in school and dropped out, etc.
Not being able to pay when faced with a large expense is one thing; most parents would help out if their child was in that situation.
Not valuing the expense is definitely another, and it's a difficult lesson to learn later in life.
I might be weird but really I do not understand giving your child money. I never got money as a child, ever. I just got things on birthdays and Christmas, that was it. We went without a LOT mostly because we didn't have a lot of money. This taught me to really value the things I do have, and not to expect anything. I also never got into the consumer culture.
The most common reason I have heard is that there are psychological benefits from a child having a sense of responsibility and ownership of the money, as well as learning the value of the money.
There is also the fact that, in some cases, a child better knows how to spend money to make himself happy then his/her parent. Obviously this is not true for every type of expenditure, but if you are going to spend $X to buy your child luxieries like new toys, it seems reasonable that your child would be better informed in how to spend part that money. Or, you can decide what you think (s)he wants, and buy it for him/her on arbitrary dates such as Christmas or birthdays.
Did you never get cash for birthdays or Christmas? I had a sizable number of friends growing up who claimed to "get no allowance", but they spent a shocking amount on frivolities. Turns out their annual gifts-received line item was significantly more than the pittance I received for allowance, annualized.
Not saying that was your situation, just remembering my annoyance at my friends dishonesty/innumeracy.
Why shield them from the hardships of life? Put them to work early, like during summers or on the weekends. It's like most things in life, you can tell them "it's hard to [earn/do/learn] X," but the actual exposure to X develops a different level of appreciation.
Earning money is one thing. But teaching someone how to budget has drastically better chances of using their money more effectively.
Besides, once they get old enough to work (maybe throw in chores) they'll already have plans on what they want to do with the money that goes beyond drinking, games and consumer goods.
> It's like most things in life, you can tell them "it's hard to [earn/do/learn] X," but the actual exposure to X develops a different level of appreciation.
How about just making/letting kids work, and not make such a big deal out of how hard it might be? (work in general; some people think that 'kids should be kids', but I'm not so sure that is optimum. Maybe it would be great if no adult had to work, either, but that is impractical.) No wonder how many people have such a hate-relationship to work when we try to shield children from work\* all the while complaining about work ourselves.
People say that you should do work that you like, work that gives you a purpose etc. But who can blame them for having a hard time with that when all they've heard growing up is how miserable work (in the general sense) is?
I don't know psychology, so this is just a theory I have.
I'd rather teach how to earn money in an enjoyable way. "This is work, it's unpleasant but it earns you money and keeps you alive and we all do it because we have to" is not really the message I want to convey.
I simply pay my kids for the work they do, they store it in a bank, and then I let them spend it. When they get older they will need to put aside some money for saving, some for spending, and some for giving away (their choice on the breakdown but it needs to be something in each).
i dont think its a great way - teaching indirectly via worrying - but it has some value in that they know spending it has to be done with some thought because there is only a finite supply and we like a nice warm house.
i try to counteract the negativity of 'not spending by worrying' by occasionally making small purchases that are purly for enjoyment - a toy, a dinner out, a weekend at the beach.
Same way I was taught. You don't get shit unless you do something for it.
When I was a kid, my dad hired me to do jobs on the clock around the house for $10 an hour, or whatever minimum wage was at the time. We had a set schedule, we had a fake tax schedule. We wrote everything out, calculated it, pretended to invest it into things like real estate etc.
When I was younger I used the money I saved up, around $15,000, to buy the shack outside our house. My first "investment". Rules were it was completely mine and my parents couldn't touch it. Insulated, spacious, my own little lofty apartment type. It was great, during high school I basically turned it into a smoke shack.
I kept it until college, at which point my dad pulled out the original $15k I gave him for it and used it for my college fund and said "you now know how to value money". He wasn't a man of many words, so when he says something like that it really means a lot.
I was taught this from a super young age, I didn't even bother to beg or throw a fit about anything because I knew my dad would just stare at me until it was over, and if I didn't have the cash, I didn't get the cookies.
[+] [-] dalke|12 years ago|reply
I grew up in a family without much money. I decided that the best solution to reduce expenses was to not ask for things. I didn't tell my parents about this because telling them might lead to them having more stress about money.
To give you some idea, everyone month or so we went out to dinner at a restaurant. That was so exciting for my sister and me. The restaurant? Burger King. Compare to the essay, where it says "we ate at McDonalds three times in two days" Jim Anthony's 6 year old is in a very different demographic than I was.
As an older kid, I might sometimes get a few quarters to play a video game (this was the 1980s), and I would spend 30 minutes watching others play, to make sure the quarter was worth it. I got my entertainment also by watching the screens and thinking about how it might be played.
I did get an allowance. It wasn't much. I didn't often ask for my allowance, since that would have been less money for the family. I recall I could get extra money for taking out the garbage or mowing the lawn. Perhaps not coincidentally, those are the two household tasks I now dread.
When I went off to college (full scholarship in a state school, including room and board, for doing well in school and on the PSAT - doing homework is free), I kept track of every single expense, down to a nickle used to make a photocopy. If any activity cost money, I avoided doing it.
I'm lead to believe that my viewpoint is not uncommon among those growing up without much money. It's not a fun feeling. My response still, when money is tight, is to shut down and do nothing.
Mind you, that's not the same as budgeting. Budgeting is spending for things that are worth it, and affordable. What I learned was to not spend.
Except for the parents mentioned in #11, I don't empathize with the comments.
Take #13. "It suggested an allowance of sorts, but it also required the children to cover the costs of some everyday necessary items, not just snacks, McDonalds or video games…more like clothes, shoes, haircuts, etc."
That wouldn't have worked for me. I didn't have the spending money for snacks, etc., and I would wear clothes and shoes until they had holes in them, and basically had to be ordered to get a haircut and new clothes. (See above, under "not spend money.") Actually, more like my mother had to drag me.
The essay starts with a strange observation about "blue collar", based on physical types. The entire essay can be seen as expressing a decades-old class-based upper-middle class anxiety.
[+] [-] drharris|12 years ago|reply
Right now we make good money (gotta love computing), and because of my habits the money fight is nonexistent in our family. If anything, I find myself constantly fighting to buy our kids less crap. I saw both kinds of kids growing up, and it's a really interesting thing to see how they are now as thirty-somethings. Many of the kids like me are in my boat now - even those who don't have education and professional jobs. Kids who got everything are now suffering in the current economy. It's a stark and obvious difference, at least where I'm originally from.
It's a nice life this way. I like getting a bunch of money for Christmas, and splurging on a tea mug and a set of digital calipers. Everything else is invested in the hope of early retirement. I hope my kids can see what I'm doing and do the same.
[+] [-] solarmist|12 years ago|reply
I learned that when you get money you spend it as quickly as you can on the nice-to-haves or mostly-nessicary stuff because money will literally disappear from under your fingers on paying bills and buying food.
My favorite holidays growing up were Christmas and Tax-refund day. That's how my family got our first, second and third computers.
When my dad was employed he used to give me a generous (for the 80's) allowance of $20/week, but it rarely lasted more than a couple weeks.
I'm only now getting my finances straight because I can afford to and I'm spending countless hours reading personal finance books and articles and I've had a friend that grew up learning the value of money and he showed me it's power.
[+] [-] netrus|12 years ago|reply
On the other hand, you hear all these stories of lower-class lottery winners, that are unable to keep a fortune at least for a decade or two - so I guess thats an aspect of personality deep-wired within us...
[+] [-] 3minus1|12 years ago|reply
[+] [-] AndrewKemendo|12 years ago|reply
Your writeup echoes my childhood really well and largely my approach to budgeting.
I will say though that I just remember it being a part of life and not something that was odd, or not nice. Even though we were poor my parents scraped and went into debt to send me to a private middle school filled with rich kids. So that was even more odd being the "poor kid" in the class and wanting to spend all my time at my friends' homes all the way across town.
I never had an allowance, but when I wanted to sell candy to my classmates my mom fronted me the 10 dollars for the initial outlay of candy. So in that regard my entrepreneurship started early as a result of just wanting to have some spending money as a kid.
[+] [-] cynusx|12 years ago|reply
I agree that the article talks about more well-off families since kids whining is mostly a tactic to get what they want. If the tactic never works it wouldn't be employed.
[+] [-] tptacek|12 years ago|reply
[+] [-] aestra|12 years ago|reply
Teen and especially preteen girls tend to be really skinny until they put on their adult fat. I remember fitting into a size 0 at 12 and 14, same with my sister, we were both healthy.
Then I looked at my yearbook about last year and I notice something, many girls were very very skinny, just like I was at that age. Many seemed to have the same kind of body. They didn't have the more adult body I (and many others I'm sure) grew into. In an unrelated conversation I had with a friend, she was mentioning about how her body has changed since she was in high school.
You can't really compare a child with an adult.
[+] [-] scrrr|12 years ago|reply
[+] [-] sivetic|12 years ago|reply
[+] [-] unknown|12 years ago|reply
[deleted]
[+] [-] codegeek|12 years ago|reply
We were always taught to respect money. Think before you let go of it. Challenge (not haggle) spending on something. My dad always said "if you don't respect money, it will never respect you". It is also important to show your kids that money does not come free and it has to be earned just like respect.
Overall, my goal is to teach my kids these important math/formulae:
[+] [-] morganm|12 years ago|reply
I went first with a pizza lunch. When the waiter asked what we all wanted to drink, those $2 pops suddenly had a very real impact on my bottom line. Water would be fine for everyone!
My youngest sister opted for bagels the next morning, but it took a bit of convincing to get her to spring for cream cheese!
The other sister, being the sweetheart she is, sprang for a real meal and didn't give us too much grief.
Now we all look back and laugh at the experience, but it certainly had a very real impact in the value we place on a dollar.
[+] [-] dalke|12 years ago|reply
In any case, I think you're missing part of the equation. Value isn't a stand-alone concept. It isn't "the value we place on a dollar" but in how much each of you values family meal time. Your youngest sister, at that time, placed a low value on it, compared to other possibilities that she could do with the money.
[+] [-] lingoberry|12 years ago|reply
Let children be children, don't force them to work summers and holidays to teach them a lesson, that will come in its own time. They will have to work the rest of their lives anyway. It's better to teach them how to save instead.
[+] [-] pmahoney|12 years ago|reply
[+] [-] pinko|12 years ago|reply
[+] [-] mratzloff|12 years ago|reply
Beyond these, however, I could perform additional chores in exchange for small amounts of money. My mom and I agreed on a price sheet. By doing a few of them I would have the equivalent of $10 a week or so. If there was, say, a computer game I wanted, I could do additional chores for a couple of weeks to earn the money for it. They encouraged this by helping me open a savings account early on.
Every now and then I approached my mom to renegotiate the prices (effectively to ask her for a raise). If I had been doing a good job, she would usually agree to small increases. Sometimes there were items that seemed too big for the return, and I would negotiate an increase by explaining this.
My first part-time job was at 15, but I helped where I could before that for odd money here and there. I paid for my first car with savings from that job, and I also paid my way through college (with some help from my parents for room and board).
I have never been afraid to negotiate on salary.
I feel like more than any of my friends growing up, and more than many adults I know, I understand the value of money, and I give a lot of this credit to my parents.
[+] [-] jtbigwoo|12 years ago|reply
Like I said above, it depends on the kid's personality and the family's economic situation, but I think that an allowance along with an expectation of age-appropriate daily and weekly chores works better than paying for individual chores or hours.
[+] [-] xyzzyz|12 years ago|reply
When you was positively incentivized to do more work, I only grew up a barrier around me, and learned to totally ignore their rules, punishments, screams and their authority as a whole. Also, now I really detest the chores I was tasked with most often (vacuuming, surface cleaning, dish washing), while have no problem with ones I never had to do, like laundry or ironing.
[+] [-] lazyant|12 years ago|reply
[+] [-] mcherm|12 years ago|reply
Getting paid for household tasks suggests that the household tasks are not part of your obligation to the family itself -- that if the child didn't really want the money then they could just quit helping to mow the lawn or wash the dishes.
Getting an allowance suggests that the money is theirs to do with whatever they want. For instance, my son (11) gets an allowance but he almost never spends it. It suggests that the child's finances are (at least partly) separate from the family's. And it represents "free money" earned without working for it which may or may not be a message you want to send.
The article described putting the child in charge of a portion of the family budget. The implication is that the family operates as a commune (which most families do) and the income may be earned by the parents, but is to be spent on everyone (as needed) and puts the child in charge of a piece of that. It happens to be the part that the child cares about (McDonalds and video games) because that is age-appropriate. An older child might get a larger budget and also be responsible for paying the electric bill -- assuming that they can influence it by helping to turn off lights and minimize wasteful use of electricity.
[+] [-] my3681|12 years ago|reply
I remember going to Toys R Us to buy it and when I got there, for the first time in my life, I wasn't so sure about spending the money. There was so much effort tied to it that, even as a child, it struck me that I was trading all of this time and effort for this one product. My mom made me count out each $20 bill, teaching me that money was not some nebulous idea (looking at you credit cards). Every $20 bill I counted made me think more about what I was doing.
I eventually bought it, but because all of the time spent saving up for it, I took good care of it and found it to be the most beloved console I ever owned. I feel that this experience definitely helped me understand the value of money relative to my efforts.
Oh, and my mother bought me Starfox 64 specifically to nail the point home. If you are reading this, mom, I love you.
[+] [-] DanBC|12 years ago|reply
http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00jj0s5
I don't know how long it will be available for.
Some tradtitional kids-and-money activities are harder to do today. I submitted an article some time ago about in reased policing of lemonade stands.
https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=3171665
[+] [-] skittles|12 years ago|reply
[+] [-] mratzloff|12 years ago|reply
Not being able to pay when faced with a large expense is one thing; most parents would help out if their child was in that situation.
Not valuing the expense is definitely another, and it's a difficult lesson to learn later in life.
[+] [-] aestra|12 years ago|reply
[+] [-] gizmo686|12 years ago|reply
There is also the fact that, in some cases, a child better knows how to spend money to make himself happy then his/her parent. Obviously this is not true for every type of expenditure, but if you are going to spend $X to buy your child luxieries like new toys, it seems reasonable that your child would be better informed in how to spend part that money. Or, you can decide what you think (s)he wants, and buy it for him/her on arbitrary dates such as Christmas or birthdays.
[+] [-] mercutio2|12 years ago|reply
Not saying that was your situation, just remembering my annoyance at my friends dishonesty/innumeracy.
[+] [-] yogo|12 years ago|reply
[+] [-] thezoid|12 years ago|reply
Besides, once they get old enough to work (maybe throw in chores) they'll already have plans on what they want to do with the money that goes beyond drinking, games and consumer goods.
[+] [-] mcherm|12 years ago|reply
How early? The child in the article is six years old.
[+] [-] Dewie|12 years ago|reply
How about just making/letting kids work, and not make such a big deal out of how hard it might be? (work in general; some people think that 'kids should be kids', but I'm not so sure that is optimum. Maybe it would be great if no adult had to work, either, but that is impractical.) No wonder how many people have such a hate-relationship to work when we try to shield children from work\* all the while complaining about work ourselves.
People say that you should do work that you like, work that gives you a purpose etc. But who can blame them for having a hard time with that when all they've heard growing up is how miserable work (in the general sense) is?
I don't know psychology, so this is just a theory I have.
*\ I'm not a proponent of child labour
[+] [-] poorelise|12 years ago|reply
[+] [-] jswinghammer|12 years ago|reply
[+] [-] xlevus|12 years ago|reply
It sounds counter-intuitive to me. Teach them the value of money, but then completely negate any value by forcing them to give it away?
[+] [-] andyidsinga|12 years ago|reply
i dont think its a great way - teaching indirectly via worrying - but it has some value in that they know spending it has to be done with some thought because there is only a finite supply and we like a nice warm house.
i try to counteract the negativity of 'not spending by worrying' by occasionally making small purchases that are purly for enjoyment - a toy, a dinner out, a weekend at the beach.
[+] [-] hoopism|12 years ago|reply
[+] [-] astrobe_|12 years ago|reply
[+] [-] rfnslyr|12 years ago|reply
When I was a kid, my dad hired me to do jobs on the clock around the house for $10 an hour, or whatever minimum wage was at the time. We had a set schedule, we had a fake tax schedule. We wrote everything out, calculated it, pretended to invest it into things like real estate etc.
When I was younger I used the money I saved up, around $15,000, to buy the shack outside our house. My first "investment". Rules were it was completely mine and my parents couldn't touch it. Insulated, spacious, my own little lofty apartment type. It was great, during high school I basically turned it into a smoke shack.
I kept it until college, at which point my dad pulled out the original $15k I gave him for it and used it for my college fund and said "you now know how to value money". He wasn't a man of many words, so when he says something like that it really means a lot.
I was taught this from a super young age, I didn't even bother to beg or throw a fit about anything because I knew my dad would just stare at me until it was over, and if I didn't have the cash, I didn't get the cookies.