[pardees]

Hi Jugurtha, thanks for taking the time to write this comment about my article. Please find my comments below:

Point 1:

For your example of quitting school, you are making the assumption that the tech industry has the same welcoming environment as academia for women. I can tell you that is wrong.

The same argument can be applied to your second example. At most jobs (not startups) there are harassment policies in place so I know who to complain to if my manager makes a move on me. At hackathons, these policies are not always in place. At the time, I didn't know I could complain against that man. I also wrote this blog post for my friends and they know the whole story. I apologize for not writing it, I will go back and edit my post. The man that made that comment is an angel investor in Boston and NYC. He has invested in some of my friends' startups. I was mortified that he treated me in that way and I was afraid that if I said anything I would be ostracized and have my career ruined if I said anything. My friends showed me this wasn't true.

Point 2:

Most women don't know they can have that as a career option. There are women who are working towards this vision, and we need help from experienced men to help us succeed.

I disagree with Paul Graham's statement. There is no official language in the U.S. and French is actually the language of business. English is not my first language, and though I do not have an accent, I am perceived to have one because I pronounce my name the correct way. We need to stop putting our own perceptions on each other and work together to make an industry that works for all.

I am not whining, I am talking about my experiences and this is the only way for us to learn about each other. Silencing those of us who are unhappy is not the answer. Give us the space to contribute just as much as our white and/or male counterparts have.

On Safety

At a club I can say something and that man is taken away by security. That is not always the case in the tech industry and that needs to change so we feel safe. I do not attend conferences for the entertainment of the men around me. I'm here to learn just like they are. I'm sure you get hit on by men, but are you afraid to say no because they may rape you and that is worse than just being okay with it? Do people call you a bitch or a tease when you say no? Though I could be wrong, I doubt that you have the same fears I do in the same situations.

Point 3

This is how we get inspired and this is how we fight. It has taken me almost 2.5 years to have the courage to speak about my experiences. I do realize now that my post could be seen as very negative towards men and I apologize for that. I'm going to work on a more positive post soon :)