There are a few things, many impacted by the current economic state in the US today: (doing any of these is a big help as a parent)
1. Being there. With both parents working --a lot, more often than not, kids are left to their own devices, and those devices are the new baby sitter. Games, media, Internet, etc...
While these are not bad things, they do not replace seat time and face time.
Technology can enable, but it takes people to understand people, and we are set with the task of making great people.
Hold that thought...
2. Access to resources.
Kids need a diverse set of experiences to self-identify well enough to understand how to learn how to learn and how they personally can thrive. This varies considerably among people. Parents who bring experiences, tools, mentors, their own time and expertise to the table very significantly augment the work of educators.
3. Learning with your kids.
Learning is infectious. When parents are able to be engaged, participate with their kids, everybody bonds well and everybody gets the benefit of a shared effort to improve. This sets good norms, in terms of growth, etc...
Compare and contrast Dad coming home to down a 40 after doing a 60 hour week, mom doing a 40 herself, and they are tired, checked out, managing the kids, but not investing in those kids. I'm not blaming parents here, just citing an example and it's impacts.
With:
Dad who worked an ordinary 40, mom working part time for "mad money", both of whom have energy sufficient to play with the kids, learn with them, explore hobbies, and pursue their own personal development, sharing that too.
(On a side note here, how we value labor very seriously impacts our education burden)
4. Participation in the school
Where parents can be a part of the program, there are many gains to be had. Volunteer work, kid sports, clubs, tutoring, working with educators for special needs kids, all augment the education investment.
I personally did a lot of this, due to being an adoptive foster parent. The kids needed work, and they had some special needs. Teachers were hungry for help, tips, advice. They wanted to be effective, but the personal research burden for them was high. Teaming up was magic.
One of many examples:
I attended "computer class" at a middle school, where introductory computer literacy was being taught by the "business teacher", and the school thought, business equals computers, so there you go. The introductory material was incomplete, riddled with errors, and I could go on and on.
Frankly, I rewrote a lot of that material and offered to clarify anything that educator needed. We had a few sessions and they helped a lot. Again, good educator, they just needed stuff. Stuff the school wasn't really sourcing for them as they could have. Parents can help identify these things just as much as a school can, and everybody should.
These kids will care for us in our old age. Think about that.
5. Community / peer review of student progress.
What is the goal of education?
When I ask this, I get all sorts of answers, ranging from making kids job ready, to "literacy", etc...
I submit these are the goals:
a. Building good people.
Each of these kids has some potential and it's up to us to tease it out of them. We can do that with diverse experiences, collaboration between educators and parents, and by offering a wide range of possible education options for them.
Some kids are going to be academic, headed for higher education. Some are going to be tactile, or mechanical, and we need those people too. Some will be empathetic, and could be care givers, or performers. Whatever it is, they need to self-identify, and we need to prod them in various ways to tease it out and help them maximize it.
b. Maximize who they are
People are who they are. We can influence this, but to expect everybody to fall into some cookie cutter box or other is nuts! We are much better off keeping their options open, and when they grab hold of something, help them to take for the best ride they can.
c. Good citizens
Our future leaders need to understand government, civics in general, and be critical thinkers. We don't do anywhere near enough here in the US, and there are lot of political reasons for that I'm not going to touch on, but being a good human, and a good citizen is part of education.
d. Learn how to learn and grow to thrive.
These are in no particular order. But the ability to self-learn is so damn empowering we can't afford to miss out on the benefits of it. Not every student will be able to maximize themselves in this way, but a lot of them can, and should.
6. Parents need to get real about the politics of education.
Education in the US is hosed. We've got way too many people flirting with, or in poverty, forcing more labor than is appropriate for parenting, conflicting requirements, standardized tests that hobble good educators while pushing along marginal to poor ones, and we don't even talk much about the educators who just need help!
Funding is at issue, public vs private, "maybe I can get MY kid into a good school, screw everybody else..." Yes, that goes on, and should it really?
We all have to live under the product of our politics here. So why don't we get along and recognize the education debt we are accumulating and it's impact on our future?
None of those goals are partisan things. They are all focused right on the kids and their potential. And they are appropriate for everybody, business, our future leaders, parents, home makers, etc...
And it's more than attitude. Parents can't just trust the system, and the system can't just do the right thing either.
If we want to maximize our young people, and we should, then it's in all our interests to get the raising of them done proper. Blaming won't cut it.
The cost of failures here will accrue. We will pay them, and it won't be pretty, and we could very well have made the right investments early on to avoid the big balloon payments coming due very soon.
Downvoters: Care to comment? It's more productive that way you know. You might have it right? Door is open. Sell me.
While I wait:
I got most of the things I put above, and as a parent, was able to supply most of the above, both to pretty great effect.
For what it's worth, taking blame off the table is rarely popular. Why?
Because then we realize we aren't so exceptional, and that we really should be doing something together on this, and that it's going to involve some real work in the form of face time and seat time.
You will find in your life that is true whether or not it appeals.
Carry on though, but don't think that goes without notice.
I can't add too much to what ddingus said, but will try to offer just a couple of subtle points.
Maybe this would be different in some other country. But I think parents in the US who expect the school to educate their kids with no oversight or intervention, are leaving too much to chance. Short of homeschooling, there are some specific issues that could fall directly on the shoulders of parents:
1. Preparation of kids starting at age zero.
2. Gauging if your kids are doing well enough by your standards.
3. What happens when things go wrong, e.g., when a kid falls behind or runs into disciplinary problems? So called "involved" parents will either draw on their own instincts, or learn from the network of involved parents, how to guide the school towards a resolution that doesn't involve a lowering of expectations.
ddingus|11 years ago
1. Being there. With both parents working --a lot, more often than not, kids are left to their own devices, and those devices are the new baby sitter. Games, media, Internet, etc...
While these are not bad things, they do not replace seat time and face time.
Technology can enable, but it takes people to understand people, and we are set with the task of making great people.
Hold that thought...
2. Access to resources.
Kids need a diverse set of experiences to self-identify well enough to understand how to learn how to learn and how they personally can thrive. This varies considerably among people. Parents who bring experiences, tools, mentors, their own time and expertise to the table very significantly augment the work of educators.
3. Learning with your kids.
Learning is infectious. When parents are able to be engaged, participate with their kids, everybody bonds well and everybody gets the benefit of a shared effort to improve. This sets good norms, in terms of growth, etc...
Compare and contrast Dad coming home to down a 40 after doing a 60 hour week, mom doing a 40 herself, and they are tired, checked out, managing the kids, but not investing in those kids. I'm not blaming parents here, just citing an example and it's impacts.
With:
Dad who worked an ordinary 40, mom working part time for "mad money", both of whom have energy sufficient to play with the kids, learn with them, explore hobbies, and pursue their own personal development, sharing that too.
(On a side note here, how we value labor very seriously impacts our education burden)
4. Participation in the school
Where parents can be a part of the program, there are many gains to be had. Volunteer work, kid sports, clubs, tutoring, working with educators for special needs kids, all augment the education investment.
I personally did a lot of this, due to being an adoptive foster parent. The kids needed work, and they had some special needs. Teachers were hungry for help, tips, advice. They wanted to be effective, but the personal research burden for them was high. Teaming up was magic.
One of many examples:
I attended "computer class" at a middle school, where introductory computer literacy was being taught by the "business teacher", and the school thought, business equals computers, so there you go. The introductory material was incomplete, riddled with errors, and I could go on and on.
Frankly, I rewrote a lot of that material and offered to clarify anything that educator needed. We had a few sessions and they helped a lot. Again, good educator, they just needed stuff. Stuff the school wasn't really sourcing for them as they could have. Parents can help identify these things just as much as a school can, and everybody should.
These kids will care for us in our old age. Think about that.
5. Community / peer review of student progress.
What is the goal of education?
When I ask this, I get all sorts of answers, ranging from making kids job ready, to "literacy", etc...
I submit these are the goals:
a. Building good people.
Each of these kids has some potential and it's up to us to tease it out of them. We can do that with diverse experiences, collaboration between educators and parents, and by offering a wide range of possible education options for them.
Some kids are going to be academic, headed for higher education. Some are going to be tactile, or mechanical, and we need those people too. Some will be empathetic, and could be care givers, or performers. Whatever it is, they need to self-identify, and we need to prod them in various ways to tease it out and help them maximize it.
b. Maximize who they are
People are who they are. We can influence this, but to expect everybody to fall into some cookie cutter box or other is nuts! We are much better off keeping their options open, and when they grab hold of something, help them to take for the best ride they can.
c. Good citizens
Our future leaders need to understand government, civics in general, and be critical thinkers. We don't do anywhere near enough here in the US, and there are lot of political reasons for that I'm not going to touch on, but being a good human, and a good citizen is part of education.
d. Learn how to learn and grow to thrive.
These are in no particular order. But the ability to self-learn is so damn empowering we can't afford to miss out on the benefits of it. Not every student will be able to maximize themselves in this way, but a lot of them can, and should.
6. Parents need to get real about the politics of education.
Education in the US is hosed. We've got way too many people flirting with, or in poverty, forcing more labor than is appropriate for parenting, conflicting requirements, standardized tests that hobble good educators while pushing along marginal to poor ones, and we don't even talk much about the educators who just need help!
Funding is at issue, public vs private, "maybe I can get MY kid into a good school, screw everybody else..." Yes, that goes on, and should it really?
We all have to live under the product of our politics here. So why don't we get along and recognize the education debt we are accumulating and it's impact on our future?
None of those goals are partisan things. They are all focused right on the kids and their potential. And they are appropriate for everybody, business, our future leaders, parents, home makers, etc...
And it's more than attitude. Parents can't just trust the system, and the system can't just do the right thing either.
If we want to maximize our young people, and we should, then it's in all our interests to get the raising of them done proper. Blaming won't cut it.
The cost of failures here will accrue. We will pay them, and it won't be pretty, and we could very well have made the right investments early on to avoid the big balloon payments coming due very soon.
ddingus|11 years ago
While I wait:
I got most of the things I put above, and as a parent, was able to supply most of the above, both to pretty great effect.
For what it's worth, taking blame off the table is rarely popular. Why?
Because then we realize we aren't so exceptional, and that we really should be doing something together on this, and that it's going to involve some real work in the form of face time and seat time.
You will find in your life that is true whether or not it appeals.
Carry on though, but don't think that goes without notice.
:)
tokenadult|11 years ago
analog31|11 years ago
Maybe this would be different in some other country. But I think parents in the US who expect the school to educate their kids with no oversight or intervention, are leaving too much to chance. Short of homeschooling, there are some specific issues that could fall directly on the shoulders of parents:
1. Preparation of kids starting at age zero.
2. Gauging if your kids are doing well enough by your standards.
3. What happens when things go wrong, e.g., when a kid falls behind or runs into disciplinary problems? So called "involved" parents will either draw on their own instincts, or learn from the network of involved parents, how to guide the school towards a resolution that doesn't involve a lowering of expectations.