[jamielee]

Try getting a new psychiatrist if the one you currently see is ineffective. Sometimes people say you just have to find the right therapist to really see progress.

Also, if you hate programming, you will always be mediocre and unenthusiastic. Nobody likes working with unexcited people. So break away from what you hate. I studied finance and had trouble finding a job. I didn't realize how much I hated it until I stopped forcing myself to keep trying. I found that I really liked programming and now I have a job in the technology field (though it is not cutting edge. I'm still only just beginning though!)

Your girlfriend is still with you. If you sense that your girlfriend hates you, you still have a chance to turn things around. Why don't you compensate in other ways? Finding a job takes time. In the mean time, do things to make her happy or clean up around the house, cook, etc.

Best of luck!

[jokoon]

> Also, if you hate programming, you will always be mediocre and unenthusiastic.

I like programming, I just hate php and java.