dialdial's comments

Oh man, if you ever find that forest drive west set I’d love to hear it.

Such a delight seeing psytrance and donato dozzy and dub techno pop up on HN.

Likewise, piggybacking!

Really glad to see someone else say this.

I’m not against porn, but believe for some (many?) people it can develop into an addiction, and/or warp their view of normal bodies, and reduce their capacity to relate / be intimate / empathetic.

For some people, I think viewing porn is mostly harmless; for others, they are not able to consume it without negative effects on themselves and their potential partners…

I’m also very progressive, sex positive; i find its hard to discuss this with friends or strangers because theres such a stigma against decrying porn. It’s difficult to discuss with nuance.

Another piece of anecdata…

Ive experienced the effects of porn addiction, and/or viewing from a young age, from both sides.

I have pretty niche tastes since i started watching in my very early teens, and though i find men very attractive its harder to finish with them.

Ive been with several partners who preferred porn to me. The latest had very, very unrealistic standards. They objectified my body, hard, and I swear their porn use affected their capacity for empathy. They said and did things that made me feel like a replaceable thing, they compared my to porn stars (and found me lacking).

They would collect massive amounts of porn and run off to use it multiple times a day… which wouldve honestly been fine, except for the fact that it did really affect their ability to connect with me. After theyd use porn their mood and empathy / behavior towards me would markedly change for the worse.

I am a fairly attractive, _very_ willing and attentive partner.

These experiences have honestly really damaged my self esteem and willingness to date.

I have also since stopped using porn a) to fix the first line and b) i cannot watch it without being reminded of my experiences with these men and their criticisms of my body.