I got married (answers both questions, I'm afraid). I often wonder if that is a really bad way of doing things since I tend to simply do what my wife wants. If I want "me time", I need to tell her in advance so she can put it in my schedule. However, I've always been super easy going in that respect. My wife loves organising things and trying to optimise stuff so that everything fits. She even optimises the meal preparation so that we never throw out any food (it's a miracle as far as I'm concerned). However, on the weekend I often want to cook and my wife will say, "I'd like paella. Please use up the mushrooms, milk, sauerkraut and pickles". So, I have to be pretty creative.
To be a bit more helpful (because I don't really want you marrying my wife -- it would be inconvenient for me), I think the real key is to ask yourself why you want a schedule. Where are the places you are hurting? It might be better to address those pain points directly rather than trying to overhaul your approach to living life. At least as far as I'm concerned (being very easy going in this respect), there is nothing wrong with not having a schedule. In fact, it is completely liberating. However, you need to have priorities and make sure that your priorities are addressed.
I'm very very forgetful, so sometimes, my wife needs to remind me to do a certain task 3 or 4 times before I actually do it. I started noting things down to avoid forgetting as this puts some strain on our relationship.
It is a shame that I cannot upvote the parent comment 15 times.
Jokes apart, I find parent's awareness perplexing. Wife organising nearly everything in a married couple is way more common then anyone realises where I live, yet most men like to think that they are in charge when they (we?) tend to hide away from 90% of decision making.
I don't have any strict schedule really, but I've made one weird thing recently, which seems to be making a difference. Not really long term yet, but over this weekend I seemed to actually do more useful things, than usually.
I've listed all the things I tend to do while procrastinating, instead of doing things that matter. Then I've layered them on top of each other, like "I should do X", but "instead I think about doing Y", and then "instead of doing Y, it seems I am actually doing Z instead". X -> Y -> Z -> U -> V -> (...). On some levels it splits into branches too, when I consider things of equal importance.
These layers seemed to align pretty well with my priorities, i.e. further "down the chain", I get less and less important things. (The last, least important activity, seemed to be "desperately seeking attention". :D)
Then I've noticed that this realization about doing many useless things, actually motivated me to do things from "the top of the chain" (important/useful/urgent). Not sure if it would work for everyone, but maybe worth a try. :) Personally at least I'm going to try to keep using this approach.
I have ADHD, so I'm not naturally an organised person. That being said, I've developed some really good systems to help me out. They've varied a lot over the years, but here are some key elements that I've found to stick around.
1. Writing everything down
I make sure to write down every event, task etc as soon as I can, and then process it. This makes sure that I don't keep things in my head. Just this alone gives huge returns.
2. One week at a time
I organise my life one week at a time. First, write down all your time commitments for the week (things you've already committed to doing). Then look at the time you have left. Once you have that, look at your backlog of tasks/things you want to do (from element 1) and select the things that you can reasonably do in that week. I then schedule these tasks roughly for each day.
I found that setting a few tasks for a day meant that I was able to focus on one or two tasks, rather than dealing with the weight of all my different life facets at once. This was especially useful to me during university, when I was balancing multiple subjects and clubs.
3. Plan, record, reflect cycle
This part is quite simple, and could also work on its own. First you plan your week (See 2), then during the week you write down notes for yourself. This could be:
- Where you failed (e.g. I was late for work today)
- How you felt (e.g. I really enjoyed hanging out with x friend)
- Any random thoughts/observations (e.g. I tend to get scared by strangers in hats)
I tend to set goals for each week, and then record relevant metrics (e.g. Hours on my phone if I'm trying to cut down, or days taking my medication)
Once the week is done, I do a reflection over the past week and look at what I want to change for the following week. Because I iterate weekly, there's no harm in me trying radical things with each week as an experiment.
Just the weekly iteration has been incredibly valuable for me, and has lead to some great insights.
Getting things done and time blocking are good methods. The worst ist setting all up so you can start over with this methods. It's a lot of work but in the end, it's an awesome feeling. In the beginning, after setting it up, you really need to stay focused on this methods and stick to them. After a while, you get used to it and it becomes much easier.
I've got a few different complimentary systems for different things:
- For working out, I rely on habit. I forced myself to go to the gym at a certain time for long enough that I just feel like doing it now, so I go automatically.
- For personal projects, I work off a queue based system. While I'm working on a task, I try to minimize task-switching, but if I come up with a new idea, or something else I want or need to work on related to the project, I note it down in my project management software. Then when I'm ready for a new task, I pick up the one I most want or need to work on from the queue.
- As far as the actual scheduling/time management strategy, I work from the model that will power and focus are limited resources, and that distractions and issues interfering with work tend to accumulate over the course of the day. Therefore, I start each day by pulling tasks from the queue which need the most focus, and put off communication with the outside world for at least an hour or so (or until my "first wind" starts to wear down). Getting up early helps with this.
- Other than that, I work more or less intuatively. When I find myself no longer able to focus effectively, I put down the work and knock out whatever administrative tasks I have to take care of, and when that's sorted I relax and do something I enjoy.
> I forced myself to go to the gym at a certain time for long enough that I just feel like doing it now, so I go automatically.
Character is destiny. The content of your character is your choice. Day by day, what you choose, what you think and what you do is who you become. ― Heraclitus
I'm the same when it comes to work out. I set 4PM every Monday, Wednesday and Friday as a workout time and I always plan around it.
I've been trying to do something similar with learning a language but to do it as a first thing every morning. After about 6 months I still din't manage to make a proper habit out of it.
This is what got me through college. Since then I've continued using it for everything from appointments to bills and I never forget to do anything I put on it.
I'm still in university in a math degree. I hope to continue on to the PhD program. During the school year my schedule is mostly tight and math-focused. I work between classes and on off-days. Occasionally I take a break to write or make art. I keep a little list of due dates and deadlines, but apart from that the schedule is not very strict. I don't like to get caught up in the mindset that "school is your life", and like to be a little flexible and give myself space to recuperate or work on my hobbies.
I look ahead five years. In five years I'll hopefully have my PhD, and in the next two years I'll find some undergrad research. In the next year I'll start TA'ing for classes I enjoy. Beyond that, I have dreams. I keep a close eye on my dreams-- that is, I wait for them to change, if they change, and then update my "path" to point more in that direction. But only a little bit! I point in the general direction of my dreams while keeping myself open to new possibilities. And I keep a few back-up plans, or general sustaining plans I can follow if stuff gets a little slow or doesn't work out. For example, tutoring in my country starts at $25/hour. If for some reason I'm not up to continuing my education after the bachelor's right away, I'll go into tutoring full time, then save up enough money to get back to school or really anything else. I might get a bachelor's in computer science in that case, or I might go traveling.
In the summer I do "computery" stuff-- coding challenges, coding games. I'll write more and solidify my understanding of certain math concepts that interested me during the school year.
Don't look too far ahead and don't find yourself in a position where you aren't dreaming-- yet still, don't let your dreams consume you. Always make sure you're taking one step forward. Plan your next steps or meander, but press on.
I just live a life that doesn't require scheduling much at all. Though, I understand it's not for everyone.
I work, I eat, I do hobbies, I sleep. Repeat ad nauseam.
When I do have to schedule/remember or outline things, a simple to-do list and/or Calendar app is adequate (or phone reminders, which work quite well for me)
Logically, we use iCloud, since all of us have iPhones/iOS. We subscribe to calendars and it helps everyone know what's going on. Each person in our family has a calendar, there's also a catch-all calendar to which can be "assigned" to anyone. When something's changed or added, all of us find out.
If something's not on the calendar, you can't legally get mad about forgetting about it in our house. Just the rule.
This is easy to implement right now as all three kids are under 6, so it's just my wife and I administrating it. But should be easy for everyone else over time.
I've considered implementing an always-on calendar setup in the kitchen with an old iPad. A previous job used this for meeting room scheduling and it worked really well.
On macro-level I have a shared calendar with my wife. We try to put there all planned vacations together, my business trips, nights-out, friends visiting, who needs to babysit when e.t.c
On micro level, I don't have a schedule. I try to cultivate habits. I.e. for past month I managed to wake 30 mins earlier than my daughter to drink my tea in peace and do some quick workout :-) It really helps me with the structure of the day.
I don't. I put things on my to-do list if they are important (it has never been more 20 or so items, some stay on there a long time too) and I put scheduled events on a shared Google calendar with my wife.
Aside from that I have rough goals during the week that I try to achieve such as working out 3 times, cook so and so dish, go grocery shopping, play X game, etc.
I use the GCal CLI and document my life every 30 minutes. I use it both retroactively and to plan the future. It helps me analyse my weeks, months and years and figure out where I wasted most of my time and try to optimize it.
Plus: small 8x11 white board sitting around the kitchen for reminder items for each other. Simple efficient reminder so you're not always cracking open the computer.
Also, let some things slide till tomorrow. If you do EVERYTHING that needs to be done, you'll just be busy all the time.
I wouldn't worry too much much about sticking to the schedule. Just be sure you skip it for a good reason (e.g you realize you have run out of milk, so you postpone your haircut to go shopping).
Also, and all credit to this is to Jordan Peterson, make sure you schedule something you can actually _do_, e.g make sure to schedule no more than you are willing to do, and make sure there is space for fun things in the schedule.
[+] [-] mikekchar|7 years ago|reply
To be a bit more helpful (because I don't really want you marrying my wife -- it would be inconvenient for me), I think the real key is to ask yourself why you want a schedule. Where are the places you are hurting? It might be better to address those pain points directly rather than trying to overhaul your approach to living life. At least as far as I'm concerned (being very easy going in this respect), there is nothing wrong with not having a schedule. In fact, it is completely liberating. However, you need to have priorities and make sure that your priorities are addressed.
[+] [-] xcubic|7 years ago|reply
There is a downside though.
I'm very very forgetful, so sometimes, my wife needs to remind me to do a certain task 3 or 4 times before I actually do it. I started noting things down to avoid forgetting as this puts some strain on our relationship.
[+] [-] atmosx|7 years ago|reply
Jokes apart, I find parent's awareness perplexing. Wife organising nearly everything in a married couple is way more common then anyone realises where I live, yet most men like to think that they are in charge when they (we?) tend to hide away from 90% of decision making.
[+] [-] nnrtw|7 years ago|reply
I've listed all the things I tend to do while procrastinating, instead of doing things that matter. Then I've layered them on top of each other, like "I should do X", but "instead I think about doing Y", and then "instead of doing Y, it seems I am actually doing Z instead". X -> Y -> Z -> U -> V -> (...). On some levels it splits into branches too, when I consider things of equal importance.
These layers seemed to align pretty well with my priorities, i.e. further "down the chain", I get less and less important things. (The last, least important activity, seemed to be "desperately seeking attention". :D)
Then I've noticed that this realization about doing many useless things, actually motivated me to do things from "the top of the chain" (important/useful/urgent). Not sure if it would work for everyone, but maybe worth a try. :) Personally at least I'm going to try to keep using this approach.
UPDATE: there, I've obfuscated it a bit, and put it online with sources - https://bl.ocks.org/nnrtw/43c0b5d4fed216c7d98bb65645212495
[+] [-] ArrayList|7 years ago|reply
Doctors hate him!
[+] [-] theandrewbailey|7 years ago|reply
[+] [-] kirubakaran|7 years ago|reply
[+] [-] Jefro118|7 years ago|reply
[+] [-] mailjenil|7 years ago|reply
[+] [-] atiredturte|7 years ago|reply
1. Writing everything down
I make sure to write down every event, task etc as soon as I can, and then process it. This makes sure that I don't keep things in my head. Just this alone gives huge returns.
2. One week at a time
I organise my life one week at a time. First, write down all your time commitments for the week (things you've already committed to doing). Then look at the time you have left. Once you have that, look at your backlog of tasks/things you want to do (from element 1) and select the things that you can reasonably do in that week. I then schedule these tasks roughly for each day.
I found that setting a few tasks for a day meant that I was able to focus on one or two tasks, rather than dealing with the weight of all my different life facets at once. This was especially useful to me during university, when I was balancing multiple subjects and clubs.
3. Plan, record, reflect cycle
This part is quite simple, and could also work on its own. First you plan your week (See 2), then during the week you write down notes for yourself. This could be: - Where you failed (e.g. I was late for work today) - How you felt (e.g. I really enjoyed hanging out with x friend) - Any random thoughts/observations (e.g. I tend to get scared by strangers in hats)
I tend to set goals for each week, and then record relevant metrics (e.g. Hours on my phone if I'm trying to cut down, or days taking my medication)
Once the week is done, I do a reflection over the past week and look at what I want to change for the following week. Because I iterate weekly, there's no harm in me trying radical things with each week as an experiment.
Just the weekly iteration has been incredibly valuable for me, and has lead to some great insights.
[+] [-] PeOe|7 years ago|reply
If you want to learn more about it, I can recommend this articles about GTD https://zenkit.com/en/blog/a-beginners-guide-to-getting-thin...
Time Blocking https://zenkit.com/en/blog/why-you-should-be-time-blocking-a...
[+] [-] vi1rus|7 years ago|reply
As a project manager with multiple projects where my work was to have others do the work it was a good methodology.
As a DevOps guy that is heavily in the dev side I find it destructive.
[+] [-] raywu|7 years ago|reply
I use Airtable to manage GTD.
[+] [-] skohan|7 years ago|reply
- For working out, I rely on habit. I forced myself to go to the gym at a certain time for long enough that I just feel like doing it now, so I go automatically.
- For personal projects, I work off a queue based system. While I'm working on a task, I try to minimize task-switching, but if I come up with a new idea, or something else I want or need to work on related to the project, I note it down in my project management software. Then when I'm ready for a new task, I pick up the one I most want or need to work on from the queue.
- As far as the actual scheduling/time management strategy, I work from the model that will power and focus are limited resources, and that distractions and issues interfering with work tend to accumulate over the course of the day. Therefore, I start each day by pulling tasks from the queue which need the most focus, and put off communication with the outside world for at least an hour or so (or until my "first wind" starts to wear down). Getting up early helps with this.
- Other than that, I work more or less intuatively. When I find myself no longer able to focus effectively, I put down the work and knock out whatever administrative tasks I have to take care of, and when that's sorted I relax and do something I enjoy.
[+] [-] natmaka|7 years ago|reply
Character is destiny. The content of your character is your choice. Day by day, what you choose, what you think and what you do is who you become. ― Heraclitus
[+] [-] msadowski|7 years ago|reply
I've been trying to do something similar with learning a language but to do it as a first thing every morning. After about 6 months I still din't manage to make a proper habit out of it.
[+] [-] vi1rus|7 years ago|reply
Also is it FIFO, LIFO or a priority model?
My queue seems to bloat, then I tried to mitigated that by telling myself if something is in the queue for X amount of time remove it.
Nowadays that removal just becomes a JIRA story but it's rather inefficient for me.
[+] [-] wordpressdev|7 years ago|reply
If you are interested to know what is Todoist and how does it work, I have written a blog post on it. Have a read.
https://www.kashifaziz.me/todoist-productivity-tips.html/
[+] [-] btkramer9|7 years ago|reply
[+] [-] creep|7 years ago|reply
I'm still in university in a math degree. I hope to continue on to the PhD program. During the school year my schedule is mostly tight and math-focused. I work between classes and on off-days. Occasionally I take a break to write or make art. I keep a little list of due dates and deadlines, but apart from that the schedule is not very strict. I don't like to get caught up in the mindset that "school is your life", and like to be a little flexible and give myself space to recuperate or work on my hobbies.
I look ahead five years. In five years I'll hopefully have my PhD, and in the next two years I'll find some undergrad research. In the next year I'll start TA'ing for classes I enjoy. Beyond that, I have dreams. I keep a close eye on my dreams-- that is, I wait for them to change, if they change, and then update my "path" to point more in that direction. But only a little bit! I point in the general direction of my dreams while keeping myself open to new possibilities. And I keep a few back-up plans, or general sustaining plans I can follow if stuff gets a little slow or doesn't work out. For example, tutoring in my country starts at $25/hour. If for some reason I'm not up to continuing my education after the bachelor's right away, I'll go into tutoring full time, then save up enough money to get back to school or really anything else. I might get a bachelor's in computer science in that case, or I might go traveling.
In the summer I do "computery" stuff-- coding challenges, coding games. I'll write more and solidify my understanding of certain math concepts that interested me during the school year.
Don't look too far ahead and don't find yourself in a position where you aren't dreaming-- yet still, don't let your dreams consume you. Always make sure you're taking one step forward. Plan your next steps or meander, but press on.
[+] [-] kup0|7 years ago|reply
I work, I eat, I do hobbies, I sleep. Repeat ad nauseam.
When I do have to schedule/remember or outline things, a simple to-do list and/or Calendar app is adequate (or phone reminders, which work quite well for me)
[+] [-] EADGBE|7 years ago|reply
Logically, we use iCloud, since all of us have iPhones/iOS. We subscribe to calendars and it helps everyone know what's going on. Each person in our family has a calendar, there's also a catch-all calendar to which can be "assigned" to anyone. When something's changed or added, all of us find out.
If something's not on the calendar, you can't legally get mad about forgetting about it in our house. Just the rule.
This is easy to implement right now as all three kids are under 6, so it's just my wife and I administrating it. But should be easy for everyone else over time.
I've considered implementing an always-on calendar setup in the kitchen with an old iPad. A previous job used this for meeting room scheduling and it worked really well.
[+] [-] a-saleh|7 years ago|reply
On micro level, I don't have a schedule. I try to cultivate habits. I.e. for past month I managed to wake 30 mins earlier than my daughter to drink my tea in peace and do some quick workout :-) It really helps me with the structure of the day.
[+] [-] dyeje|7 years ago|reply
Aside from that I have rough goals during the week that I try to achieve such as working out 3 times, cook so and so dish, go grocery shopping, play X game, etc.
I'm pretty happy with the results.
[+] [-] karanchawla|7 years ago|reply
[+] [-] nickthemagicman|7 years ago|reply
It's taken me several years to get a good system down but I think it's pretty pretty good at the moment.
[+] [-] zzo38computer|7 years ago|reply
[+] [-] kentms|7 years ago|reply
[+] [-] drewr|7 years ago|reply
[+] [-] magwa101|7 years ago|reply
Plus: small 8x11 white board sitting around the kitchen for reminder items for each other. Simple efficient reminder so you're not always cracking open the computer.
Also, let some things slide till tomorrow. If you do EVERYTHING that needs to be done, you'll just be busy all the time.
[+] [-] tomjen3|7 years ago|reply
Also, and all credit to this is to Jordan Peterson, make sure you schedule something you can actually _do_, e.g make sure to schedule no more than you are willing to do, and make sure there is space for fun things in the schedule.
[+] [-] skaomatic|7 years ago|reply
[+] [-] cruisebay|7 years ago|reply
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