Ask HN: How to keep water-obsessed autistic child from wasting water?

[bryanrasmussen]

I have a child with autism, who has developed a fascination with the bath and running the water. If we stop him he of course has a meltdown, so what I am looking for is a method for controlling the water easily from another point than the faucet. I guess a plumber can set me up something like that, but I also wanted to see if anyone had suggestions. Also was wondering if anyone had suggestions for setting up a recycled tub, that is to say the water can be set to run back after running out, so that it does not cost excessive amounts.

[DoingIsLearning]

For a 'recycled tub' implementation, you can easily source a water pump from an aquarium supplier, if they sell gear for salt water aquariums they will most likely have large enough pumps.

Nevertheless, and I hope this sounds constructive, this is the kind of topic that you should really be discussing with an occupational therapist or child psychologist with experience in autism.

For some topics the internet can be a terrible place for advice.

[bryanrasmussen]

I mean sure, but none of our therapists know anything about how to construct a solution where the water recycles so we don't end up paying 300 dollars a month in water while trying to get him to not fixate on running water all day long. It actually seemed like the kind of thing that HN might be good at, thumbs up for the aquarium idea which I wouldn't have thought of.

on edit: changed a no to know, was multitasking.

[freemint]

> water pump

Some water pump models will break if they do not pump water but air. Only buy pumps which are able to handle air in take.

[klyrs]

My kid has autism, and exhibits a similar behavior. What he really likes is the running water, and when we introduced him to showering, oh my god, he's in love. Showers are a lot more efficient than letting the tub run full blast, and we set a timer so we're not the ones telling him when to get out -- sometimes he rages at the timer, but it subsides quickly because he knows he can't bargain with the timer.

[PartiallyTyped]

Funnily enough, I am doing something similar to myself. I setup timers for things, so instead of arguing and bargaining with myself or even anticipating the event, I just obey the timer and do as I must.

[j-pb]

This project seems to fit your need perfectly. It's open hardware, and designed for showers, but should be easily retrofittable for your specific faucet case.

https://showerloop.org/

[Cthulhu_]

That's actually really clever and IMO should be built into homes by default; there's so much water being wasted by heating up potable water and just letting it drain out. And most people aren't THAT dirty anyway. If this filters out soap and the like before it goes into the sewers that's probably also a good thing.

[bryanrasmussen]

thanks!

[bmsleight_]

Also son with Autism.

Meltdown happen when you remove the stimulus without warning. Always, Always give a countdown. Either in time or turns.

So reason - i.e. Time to eat now, 10 more seconds before water is turned off. 10..9.8..3.2.1 Turn off water.

The Autism Society do a LIFE changing course for parents on understanding Autism.

Embrace the water games. Make a clear pipe water feature and enjoy to together.

Hope this helps.

[mbarras_ing]

Also son with Autism.

Can confirm - we do everything with countdown. He also loves using the timer on my phone for activities (ed psych thinks his anxiety decreases, as he feels in control).

Also giving options (even if contrived) work well for him. E.g. "do you want to brush teeth or put PJs on first?". He has to do both, but feels more at ease getting to choose.

Best of luck!

[Zenst]

Get one of those water fountain pumps you can put in the bath so they get that flowing water vibe they crave.

Also suggest swimmming leasons and from there maybe a swimming club.

Saying this as worked for me.

[wsostt]

We had a small hand pump toy that would suck up the tub water and spray it. It was a manual pump so it taught cause/effect which is critical for development.

Second the swimming lessons. I have two daughters with a rare genetic condition and they are obsessed with swimming in the pool. My older is physically challenged, wears AFO legs braces, has a seriously disturbed gait, and frequently uses a chair when we’re out in public. But she can swim non-stop for an hour. Great exercise, great strength building, great for safety. I feel like her freedom in the water is an escape from her limitations on land. :D

[Khelavaster]

Be careful your autistic son doesn't learn there's such a water shortage that you MUST save water.

In fact, compare the cost of water wasted to the cost of other inputs in his life.

[moistly]

Here are water-themed toys might interest you/them:

https://www.amazon.com/Romper-Room-Waterfuls/dp/B07DQNYD8Z

https://bridgestreettoys.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/HYDR...

https://www.target.com/c/sand-water-tables-outdoor-toys/-/N-...

What I was really looking for was a science toy I had as a kid, where you could build various types of pumps, siphons, etc. It only needed a sinkful of water.

[kortex]

Young me would have LOVED that hydrodynamic building set.

Adult me would still love it, but I used to, too.

[Havoc]

Perhaps a silly idea, but how about one of those cat fountains that recycles water as a distraction?

That has the whole moving water & noise aspect without continuous water intake

[carlmr]

I think it's not such a silly idea. At least it works for my mom's cat, which also only drinks running water.

[vivegi]

If it is about a water toy that he can play with that has flowing water, consider a Heron's fountain.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heron%27s_fountain

There are many YouTube videos that show how to make one using low cost / household materials.

[leohonexus]

Fixing it with tech seems like an XY problem. If he’s old enough he’ll figure out eventually how to bypass it / develop another obsession. Have you entertained the idea of therapy?

You might have success with a CBT or exposure therapist. If he’s too young a play therapist might be more able to help.

[chownie]

You can't really CBT special interests out of autistic people, to attempt it would be cruel at the very least.

A timer for play would be a definite step up, the sudden removal of interesting stimulus feels like a punishment for the autistic person.

[clearcarbon]

Not sure if this would be the most cost effective solution but maybe some pc water cooling parts, with clear tubing it would also allow them to see it flowing through the system. With quick release systems they might (age dependent) be able to re-arrange the system to experiment with different systems and flows.

Difficulty would be keeping it safe with regards to electric.

[moolcool]

I bet you could rig a water cooling pump to run off a 12v power tool battery, and completely remove the need for dangerous wall AC power from the equation.

[freemint]

> Also was wondering if anyone had suggestions for setting up a recycled tub, that is to say the water can be set to run back after running out, so that it does not cost excessive amounts.

Unless you actually have a cost issue (do the math on that) there already exist a really good water recycling system in many developed countries https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reclaimed_water even if it doesn't exist where you are, water is not lost due to the water cycle. In many places domestic water use is a negligible part of the water supply issue, don't be guilted into messing with your childs development for that.

I would generally teach the children to turn off water after it is done, to not leave the room if water is running and how to prevent flooding and how deal with flooding.

If cost is actually an issue a simple variant to reduce that cost without reducing agency is to have a simple mechanic constraint how far the tab can be opened that is tamper obvious. If those mechanisms are damaged address that issue . Reinforcing is possible but also increases the risk of damage to faucet which is going to be a lot more expensive.

Water toys which use less water but also have an acceptable spilling risk could reduce water use. This could be anything from a digital circuit using water logic that just stops doing something interesting or an analog computer with a limited capacity before it fills up whose drain rate is small or requires adult supervision (lock) to drain. Closed containers with fluids might also be interesting. Such as non mixing differently colored fluids which in a drop proof container.

If you want change the amount of water allowed in a way depending on good behaviour a 3d printing pen would allow to construct tamper obvious mechanical constraints with different amounts of reinforcement which are unable to be removed without breaking in most tabs.

[bryanrasmussen]

>Unless you actually have a cost issue (do the math on that)

well, I'm in Denmark, we share the water costs of the house with our downstairs neighbor and it's paid once per year. This year it went up by 15000 DKK (approx. $2,000) more than other years, which I think is probably my son's fault and this past month his usage has gotten significantly worse.

[llamaLord]

Explain to them how it's consuming a lot of water and explain why that's a problem (plants, other animals, need water etc). Then challenge them to come up with a way to solve the problem. Autistic kids are often incredibly good at solving practical problems like that and it'll give them a better understanding of how things work.

Faucet heads that are designed for saving water often are set-up to create the "feeling" of lots of water, without actually using the same volume (water saving rain style shower heads are particularly good at this).

Something like that would probably preserve any sensory elements of the experience they enjoy and would cut the water consumption by 60-70%.

[syntheweave]

If the child is old enough, I suggest an introduction to watercolor paints. Done outside with a plastic cafe tray holding the media, messes can be easily avoided, and the process can be guided by using coloring books(some of which come in paper heavy enough to take water-based pigments). The sound and tactile feeling of whipping a brush through the water cup and then applying it to the paper and seeing things happen is an extremely satisfying, low-waste, low-risk way of playing with water. It's not exactly the same as experiencing flowing water but it provides a similar amount of sensory stimulus.

[killingtime74]

Unorthodox, in Wellington New Zealand, where I live. Water is unmetered. It rains a lot. He can waste as much as he likes here

[xupybd]

Wait for three waters. I suspect the entire country will be metered soon.

[edmcnulty101]

I'm from New Orleans we have TOO MUCH water there.

[xupybd]

I have friends who had a son with a similar obsession. He has a form of autism. They worked with him intensively and he's at the point where he no longer melts down. Everyone one is different and I'm not inferring anything about your child by mentioning this. Until reading this I'd forgotten about his obsessions years ago. If you met him now you'd have no idea what he was like before.

I don't even know what they did only that it was hours per day for years and year.

I was amazed at his transformation.

On a more helpful note, what about a fish tank pump and a pond or other water holding tank?

[Mandatum]

Age?

Verbal?

Can they look after themselves?

From your description I assume under 14, no, no.

Recycling water fountain somewhere near tiles or a drain if you can afford it. There’s the pot type which has water running down the sides, low maintenance and they’re very, very safe.

[taffronaut]

It would be useful to know what the attraction is, since if you try to create an alternative, it might not be satisfying enough in the key aspect. Bath faucets are quite large, maybe the water output is quite chaotic, there's a significant drop/splash, and the bath (metal, acrylic?) could be quite resonant - as maybe the bathroom if it's tiled.

For a first step, you could turn off the main house water (assume this is controlled elsewhere) briefly until your child loses interest and leaves the bathroom.

[thenerdhead]

There are running sink play sets that include a battery operated or usb powered faucet that recycle water. You can also make your own for under twenty bucks.

[msmenardi]

Check out children's museums. They often have great water features, and plus they're like... The coolest places in the world for autistic kids.